Sorry for your losses bubby2010 and Delirium. Terrible news from wonderful ladies. Xxx
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01-11-2013 21:06 #11-
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
01-11-2013 21:14 #12
Just wanted to say I'm so sorry. I too have been in the same situation. Take the time you need to grieve. There's no time limit or right or wrong way - only what is right for you. Be kind to yourself xxxx
01-11-2013 21:27 #13
I am so, so sorry. It's such an awful thing to go through, especially when you've been trying so long.
This part is just horrible, you just have to try to ride it out. I found the only thing that helped was time, in time you'll find new energy and it won't feel so overwhelming. Lean on your partner, let them be there for you and you will get through it together.
01-11-2013 21:57 #14
I am so sorry. Allow yourself the time to grieve and be kind to yourself.
01-11-2013 22:33 #15
Hey i just wanted to say that what ur going through sounds completely normal to me. It's a heart breaking experience to lose a baby so loved and wished for after so long ttc... Take time to grieve for as long as you need. Take care and look after yourself.
Last edited by Butterfly39; 01-11-2013 at 23:01.
02-11-2013 07:44 #16Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2009
Thanks ladies. I long for the day I don't cry myself to sleep and start again the moment my eyes open. Hubby and I are going to buy a tree today to plant in honour of our precious little miracle. I will write a little letter to bubby to place under it in a hope to gain some closer...some way of acknowledging the existence of my angel baby...not matter how short of time we had him. In my heart I'm sure it was a boy.
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02-11-2013 08:25 #17
Bubby- I'm so sorry for your loss. I have been there twice and feel your pain. It's ok to cry. After losing my boy at 17 weeks pregnant I cried non stop and felt like it wouldn't ever stop. I was broken and felt alone even though people were around to console me. I felt like I didn't know how to feel normal again. Please know that although it doesn't feel like it now but the crying will ease and you will start feeling somewhat yourself as time passes. I sought out a lot of help to deal with my grief and it has helped immensely. The Pregnancy loss Australia website has lots of info and ideas that helped me. You can call or email a counsellor if you can't see one face to face.
Planting a tree and writing a letter to your baby is a lovely idea. We did that for both angel babies. Nothing will ever replace the piece of your heart that has been taken away but please know you are not alone. If you want someone to talk to feel free to PM me. Big hugs x
03-11-2013 21:12 #18Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2011
I'm very sorry for your loss, no one should have to go through it. Everything you are feeling is completely normal - it's devastating.
Give yourself the time and space to grieve as much as you need to, I found that once all the bleeding had stopped and the hormones were out of my system it got easier to deal with and while I was still really sad the crying all the time stopped and I was able to function better.
03-11-2013 22:02 #19
I am so sorry to hear about what you are going through. There is some great advice offered above and I think the steps you are taking will certainly help on your path to recovery.
It is such a sad thing to happen for anyone, but for me the fact it was an IVF pregnancy felt like some kind of cruel joke. We go on such an emotional roller coaster getting that elusive BFP and them to have it taken away just feels so unfair. This unfairness really stuck with me and I spent a lot of time talking through it with my counsellor.
I can't recommend talking to a professional more highly. I spoke to her about stupid things I didn't even feel I could bring up with my DH, and she helped me deal with some big issues like other people in my life who were pregnant.
One thing really stuck with me and it seems so logical, but she warned me that pregnant people will likely complain about their pregnancy. I don't think I would have coped at all hearing a pregnant woman due near my EDD complain (which did happen) if she hadn't prepared me.
My EDD has just passed and I still feel sad, I still feel robbed, I still feel it is unfair, but I also see the goods things again and acknowledge but don't dwell on those negative emotions.
Please take care of yourself. You will start to feel better even though it doesn't seem like it now. Reach out if you want to chat at all. Far too many of us know your pain and want to help how ever we can xxx
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