Another long term IVFer here. I agree whole heartedly with DJ Nette. As Starfish and myself and many others have proven, sometimes it takes many goes. I've done 9 stim cycles, plus having had 3 cycles cancelled, so 11 transfers altogether to get my precious DD. She was my last attempt with my own eggs, (our emotional state and marriage would not have lasted another failure) and at that point we weren't sure if we would ever use a donor. It's OK to take a break (as long as you're not too old and taking too long a break), recharge, patch up the wounds, then start again if you want to.
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31-10-2013 14:06 #11
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DJ Nette (31-10-2013)
31-10-2013 20:16 #12
A truly wonderful hubber, Mum4Nay, gave me the best ever answer to this question when I posted it in desperation late one night. She said you should stop when it gets harder to keep going than it does to stop. That simple sentence really clarified things for me and helped me to make the decision. In my case it helped me decide to keep going, and that's why we now have my beautiful DS2. Good luck!
31-10-2013 20:34 #13
I hit that point after our 7th failed cycle. I just couldn't handle any more emotional disappointment. I think you just know. (Sorry I know that doesn't really help). My FS suggested that we try one more with a donor egg and it was the best decision we ever made. It turns out #8 was our 'just one more' and it worked. We just had to switch up the ingredients.
If we didn't have this option, our next step would have been onto the adoption list and hope we could get a bubba before we were 50.
Good luck on this cycle, I hope this is your BFPS and you don't have to make that decision :-)
01-11-2013 11:17 #14
Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences, you've given me a few things to think about.
01-11-2013 11:52 #15Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2011
We kept trying, because wanted to look back when I'm 45 and say that I tried everything possible. We thought that our life would be without children, but we were still going through cycles to feel that we'd tried everything. I suppose everyone has to do what feels right for them, and the decisions to stop or move to other options are personal ones.
My prognosis was pretty hopeless, with AMH<1, cycles with embryos that didn't grow, empty follicles, and no follicles. Two FS refused to treat me anymore unless I used donor eggs, one FS ridiculed me for continuing to try. The famous Wazza straight away said donor eggs and gave me a 1% chance with my own. I have consulted with 8 FS in my journey. My AF had become very irregular, and at the time that I got AF to start my last cycle, I had not had AF for nearly 3 months. In the last cycle, I had one follicle, and one egg, this egg became my first transfer and a BFP, at age 41. I am now 28 weeks UTD.
I have been extremely fortunate for this to happen, and I'm not sure why it suddenly worked (I took a lot of crazy supplements and we used PICSI - maybe that helped). I am not smarter or any more deserving than anyone else here. Just saying that sometimes unexpected things can happen, even in the most hopeless situation, and the docs have no way of predicting it.
Most of my heartache was about not being able to get any eggs and "properly try". I have been very fortunate in that I have not had the losses that many other ladies here have had, so can't speak from the perspective of having gone though many losses. (I am still worried about sounding too cocky and jinxing everything as well).
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01-11-2013 12:02 #16
Thank you so much for posting Chook, it was exactly what I needed to hear today, you have given me hope!
A huge congrats on your pregnancy, hopefully I can join the club one day!
01-11-2013 13:36 #17
Congrats Chook - amazing story! All the best for the rest of your pregnancy, the birth and motherhood!
07-12-2013 17:59 #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2011
I'm a little bit late in responding to this but here it goes.
My husband and I were about 27 when we started trying to conceive. We're now 31 and have a little eight month old baby girl through the use of an egg donor. Our journey was hard but I wouldn't have it any other way, my little girl is different but that just makes her even more special.
After our second stim cycle we agreed to do one more and then move to donor eggs. Our third stim cycle was a fail and we then moved on to using my brother's wife's eggs. Three embryos and the first one stuck.
Financially we could have continued with my eggs but we were just over it emotionally. When our last cycle failed I was actually a little relieved. If the donor eggs hadn't of worked I'm not sure what we would have done.
07-12-2013 19:55 #19
Thanks again everyone for your stories, it's a huge inspiration and you're all amazingly strong.
To update - it was 3rd time lucky for us and I'll be 8wks pregnant on Monday
We also got one in the freezer on the last cycle which was a first for us. We're very excited but I'll feel better when we pass the 12wk scan and probably won't relax until I can start feeling bub move.
07-12-2013 20:31 #20
Wow cue that was quick, well done!
Sending you the stickiest of vibes ! X
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