I agree that it will sort itself out over time, but I remember how long that time felt! My son wouldn't take a dummy for a long time, and absolutely resisted being swaddled. I ended up co-sleeping a lot - there are ways that are safer than others which might be worth googling. I was able to sleep without moving a muscle, which surprised me, but I did have a huge fear of SIDS and spent the first few seconds after waking in absolute guilty fear, watching for the relief of seeing my son breathing. I was so desperate for sleep I just did what I had to.
Just wondering - can you pop him in his bouncer in your bedroom overnight? Otherwise, do you have a nice comfy couch or recliner so you can get some rest sitting up while holding him?
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22-10-2013 15:21 #11
22-10-2013 15:31 #12
I found baby wearing helped me manage on my own during the day. DS would only sleep upright on my chest...with him in the carrier I had my arms free again.
Nights were tough....if you have family like grandparents or siblings who can come and take turns holding bub between feeds then you can get some rest yourself.
It is a hard slog but you will come out the other side of it. 😉
22-10-2013 15:42 #13
All the previous posters have great tips. I really struggled too ... It took a few weeks before dd (finally!) took a dummy. I second the bouncer in the bedroom, that's what I did as well as dd wanted to sleep in a more upright position and wouldn't go in her cot or bassinette for the first 3 months. We never co slept either. She ended up sleeping in her rocker (and still slept during the day in there for the first 5 months).
Utilise all the help you can get. Sleep when the baby sleeps, even if it means going to bed 4 times a day.
I was terrified of hubby going back to work after 3 weeks but we survived.
Do whatever it takes in the first 3 months- car rides, walks in a stroller etc. no bad habits are formed at this stage.
My dd hated being swaddled too- it became a lot easier when she was big enough for the sleeping bag.
The house will go to s..t, you'll live on toast and take away and think you can't do this forever. Relax, you won't have to! It DOES get better.
Congratulations. It'll be over before you know it and then unbelievably you'll miss those days
22-10-2013 16:37 #14Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2010
If bub will nap on your bed during the day, you can nap next to him, and there is more room for the two of you to stretch out than when you have another adult on the bed too.
Get a baby carrier (hug a bub or similar). There are so good when bub is little and needs you, but you want to do things too.
22-10-2013 18:53 #15
I just wanted to say that I feel your pain!
22-10-2013 19:53 #16
I'm totally in the same boat little gumnut. It does my head in some days as to how well she sleep during the day but is totally opposite at night. I know it's 'normal' and things will get better etc but it doesn't make it any easier to handle the situation when it's 2am and you have been playing the 'why is she crying, I just fed her and rocked her' game for 4hrs straight.
No amount of naps during the day makes that any easier to handle for me. I find it harder to cope at night and end up emotionally and physically drained and flinching at every little wimper she makes in fear that she is going to wake up again.
Sorry I can't offer much help. But I just wanted to say whenever you feel like having a cry or vent - I'm here and will probably cry right along with you.
We can get through this! We will have good days and not so good days and hopefully as the weeks go by... The good ones start adding up a bit more.
22-10-2013 19:58 #17Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2010
Hi there. This feeling of panic is normal , you have been through a massive thing and the beginning of no sleep is very hard on you emotionally . I have 3 kids and my first I did not sleep for a long time. I worried so much and slipped into a anxious state. My husband went back to work after 4 days and I was so sleep deprived. In the end I dismantled my bed and put the queen mattress on the floor , I slept with my baby by taking away the pillows and wearing warm clothes myself so I did not need a doona , I put the baby next to me and slept when he slept. Around 3 months old I put my doona back. I have slept with all three this way , fed them when they are hungry and gone back to sleep. It's not for everyone but its the only way I slept . If you really want the baby to sleep alone could you use your pram for day sleeps? Go for a walk ( most babies will sleep due to motion) come home and put the pram in a quiet spot? If not and you need the baby to sleep in the bassinette then I think if you burp your baby well after feeding then Rock to sleep she/ he may get used to it but it will take a while so don't put pressure on yourself . Don't put pressure on yourself to have a clean home or baby that sleeps , your baby is so little and it does take a while . Congratulations xxxx
23-10-2013 18:05 #18
Thank you everyone for your replies and advice!!! It is such a relief knowing this is normal and that so many others have been through it. Its hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel at the moment
Just wondering if anyone knows if the Co sleeping pods are sids approved? What about leaving baby in a swing is that safe? Sorry I probably sound overly protective and paranoid just don't want to risk anything!
Also does anyone have any tips for burping? I usually just pat him on the back for a 30 seconds unless I get a burp before then
23-10-2013 20:22 #19
I read this article from a link somewhere on BH. It was really helpful. Also there was this in it..,
Recent media hype would have you believe that bedsharing is dangerous however the research has been incredibly misreported and is highly flawed there is still NO research that shows bedsharing following the guidelines above is a safety/SIDS risk – NONE.
Whole article here.. http://babycalmblog.com/2012/07/06/t...-your-arms-30/
More reading here.. On cosleeping
Last edited by MadeWithLove; 23-10-2013 at 20:31.
23-10-2013 20:26 #20
It cab take up to half an hour to burp babies- sometimes less, sometimes more. If you can get through the first month, from then on you can use infacol and I've found it to be wonderful in helping babies burp.
Re sleeping and SIDS I'm sure it will all be on the SIDS website
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