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  1. #41
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    Good on the authorities for checking and doing their job ! I fully support mandatory reporting... Its for the best and if theres nothing sinister going on then great.

    OP im sorry you went through this but its no ones fault, they were doing their job.

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  3. #42
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    OP, I truly feel for you. It must have been both a frightening and trying time for both you and your DH.

    However, I don't agree the mandatory reporting was abused. Understandably, your DH wasn't himself due to his medication change and alcohol having been added into the mix. Due to the reasons for the change and violence, unfortunately there is no guarantee it won't happen again. The affects of medication on a person, particularly when it's new and has been tweaked, varies from person to person, with or without alcohol. It's good that you know your DH can occasionally react this way to new medication though, because now you do know what to do in this scenario.

    It's also probably a good thing that it's been reported to the proper authorities. If it hadn't been, and your DH becomes unstable due to medication change in the future again, there would be no record if something bad was to happen. At least with there being a record of the change in personality, both by your doctor, the police and childrens services, they will be in a far better position to help you should the need ever arise, as opposed to the position they would be in if it was a seeming one off that just happened and did endanger either you or your children.

    It's also been recorded that your DH has sought help, and is undergoing help, so that neither you nor your DH will be accused of being the type of parents who know there's an issue and refuse to get any assistance for it if needed (if that makes sense).

    I'm not saying this to diminish your experience, it sounds very stressful and I can understand the frustration being as both you and your DH sound like kind and loving parents, and to be made to feel like you're anything but would be both hurtful, upsetting and stressful.

  4. #43
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    Chances are the dr could have reported this aswell. They are also bound. Glad he went to doc and got it sorted. But its one thing to prescribe a drug with side effects but a doc cant know at the time of prescribing such medication his patient wont drink alcohol or take other drugs with them or do it again.

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  5. #44
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    I'm sorry you had to go through all this, but the police were doing what they had to do.

    In my job I see why Mandatory reporting is so important. If they didn't and something did happen they would be flamed for not reporting the incident.

  6. #45
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    Next time (if ever needed OP) go to mental health...they have to keep everything private. The police won't be involved at all and your dh will have the psychiatrist's help...MUCH better than the police will ever offer

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    So maybe keep the thread on track.

    OP is sharing something significant that happened to her family. No one is aware what others have been through.

    How bout deep breaths and respect for the fact we've all had different experiences

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  9. #47
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    Yup, I had a situation where I took one of my boys to ER due to a mark on his arm, that looked purple and didn't blanch when a glass was put on it. After they had done tests on him and ruled out menningecoccal, I walked in on the registrar talking to another registrar about how she was going to report me to DOCS because I was obviously abusing him.

    I was utterly mortified, humiliated and devastated that they thought that. I cried to them that I would never hurt my baby, and the look she gave me told me left me in no doubt that she didn't believe a word I said.

    The professor (not a registrar) came around the next day and decided that it was a bite mark in the shape of a child's and told me he thought my 3 year old had bitten him. He said these types of things happen all the time. A complaint wasn't made against me - but I spent 24 hours feeling like a complete wreck.

    Not sure why you think you are the only one to ever be falsely accused of something Ozemum - but it is clear from some of these comments you just aren't.

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  11. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by ozeymumof5 View Post
    Next time (if ever needed OP) go to mental health...they have to keep everything private. The police won't be involved at all and your dh will have the psychiatrist's help...MUCH better than the police will ever offer
    That's false
    Most people in mental health are mandated reporters as well

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  13. #49
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    I really feel concerned that anyone would be advocating against calling the police in a situation involving violence/threatened violence and children. I know that many of us may have had negative experiences with law enforcement and can feel put off by that, but they are trained to effectively and efficiently manage these situations. I think it's irresponsible to suggest that people are better off not calling the police for immediate help should such a scenario occur.

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  15. #50
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    I think recognising and acknowledging that it's not in anyway personal should help to cope with this scenario, a mandatory reporter HAS to report end of story. They don't get to the luxury of giving you the benefit of the doubt.

    I too would rather 9 false accusations if number 10 helped a woman or a child ( particularly a child) be protected from harm.

    Sorry this happened though OP it sounds like it would be a terrible thing to have to get through and I don't mean to diminish that in any way but looking at the big picture whoever had reported did have you and your children's very best interest at heart.


 

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