Yesterday I had my engagement party! Something I thought 'we' should be looking forward too etc.. Of course I planned everything (we chose the food, where to have it) but last minute things flowers, etc i had to deal with as df couldn't care less but I did.
I let him invite his friends (who he hasn't really seen in over 2 years) not my fault as df has his car... I never stop him! One visits I can handle in small doses when he does come over I just goto bed (they play games pc sort of thing) df has changed given up pot etc had a baby (they still go out town drink copious amounts booze)
ALL his friends got so effing **** faced including him. Falling over in shrubs, swearing smoking around my dd and me (I'm pregnant). My friend with her baby. I ended up losing is and saying excuse me wtf? Go smoke outside of this area it's not on smoking in front of me or my daughter! At the end of the night one of his fh makes left by doing a burn out and almost took me and my mum out 😳😳😳 I stuck my finger up! I was so furious wtf? I paid over 4,000 for you to treat my function like crap and do this. I'm so ashamed and so furious at df I just want to pack my things and leave. I ended up losing it because he wasn't able to help with our daughter all day I didn't trust his drunk *** I pushed him (probably out of line) I feel so embarrassed :'(
Then came the cake scenario......... I wanted a photo of us next to our cake? Isn't that normal.....? Or am I wrong? My maid of honour helps set it up. I go fetch df and come back mil lets everyone take a effing cake! WTF!! I already said 'no I want a photo first just wait' her reply was your sil got a photo of the table etcwho cares! ME I CARE! These are my memories not yours! I opened all my cards etc not one card from sil of mil i dont care about a gift or anything but a card I can put in our scrap book. Then my sil took the car that my mum was meant to take me and dd home in because I don't drive with the baby seat to take family home.........
I'm so angry, hurt and just ****ed off. I didn't spend night with my df and daughter just on my own in our new house alone
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Results 1 to 10 of 19
20-10-2013 08:26 #1
Am I over reacting? (Had worst engagement party)
20-10-2013 08:44 #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
Don't know what to say except give you a hug... Hope the day gets better.
20-10-2013 10:05 #3
Big hug. No advice. I'd be upset and furious with df. I hope he makes it up to you in an amazing way.
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20-10-2013 10:17 #4
Big hugs I'm sorry that some inconsiderate a$s wipes ruined what was meant to be a special day
I would kill my partner if that's how he and his friends acted
20-10-2013 10:19 #5Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2013
Maybe because he doesnt see his friends much he went a bit overboard. No excuse though. Just alot of disrespect on a few peoples behalf I think. Dont let this set the tone for the rest of your life though. Df ****ed up, yes he did. But im sure he's utterly ashamed of himself and regrets every minute of it. X
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20-10-2013 11:35 #6
I would suggest you guys go to counselling and get some good boundaries in order. No matter the occasion, no matter who is there, no matter what alcohol is consumed, you want your DH to be trusted to treat you and your daughter with the utmost respect.
Id personally text that to him. Let it sink in. Don't yell or get angry. Just let him know that you need to be able to trust each other. To know you always have each others backs etc...
20-10-2013 14:37 #7-
- Join Date
- Apr 2013
Id just leave, but thats my opinion. .. ur family comes before u and ur mates and the drink... my opinion IF it was me hun would be to leave easier to manage on my own without the added stress...
Hope u guys work it out, also agreed maybe counseling would be a great idea?
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20-10-2013 15:11 #8
I would make as much noise as possible today, eff his hangover. Stand close to him and bang some pots together - immature yes but gratifying!
I'd be mad as hell!!!
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20-10-2013 15:17 #9Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2013
Wow... Sounds like he doesn't associate with very nice people & considering how rude & inconsiderate his mother is... I would say he thinks this kind of behavior is acceptable.
I would be telling him calmly how you feel & working from there. To be honest, his 'friends' sound like dead beats & I wouldn't want those kind of people around my kids.
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20-10-2013 15:45 #10
I don't take my kids around his friends because they are gross but then I didn't want to feel 'controlling' but I knew he changed being with me due to starting a family almost immediately.
I think the counselling is a great idea he's not against that because I don't communicate well. Thanks for your replies x
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