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  1. #1
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    Default Stubborn child with selective hearing

    DS us only just 3, but he is often terrible at joining in group activities and will only join in when he feel like it thank you very much! When he's good, he's an angel, but when he is gets his stubborn on he simply refuses to listen and there is no telling/asking him, he will either completely ignore me, laugh, or put on his big frowny face and cry.

    I know toddlers can be like this, but he is worse than others his age at listening, and when he is like this I feel completely useless (trust me I've tried talking him through it, on his level, being firm and even threatening if he's being a royal brat!).

    Often, he is tired. He has always been a very early riser no matter his bedtime and toddler activities are always mid-morning which is the worst time for him. But I don't think it's as simple as being tired, he can be a bad listener in general and is quite stubborn (like his mother I suppose in some ways). Today, he accidentally bumped another toddler on the trampoline and then got so upset! Just sat there crying as I tried to rub it off and tell its it's fine accidents happen.

    He is so unpredictable to take out. I never know if he is going to be good today or just wander off his own way and flop to the floor if I try to make him go a different way. It's very difficult because I'm often carrying bags and can't carry him too so I feel very stuck at those times.

    Basically, if he doesn't want to do something he simply won't, and there's no talking him around.

    On the other hand people are always telling me what a wonderful, sweet and well-mannered, bright and happy boy he is! Yes I say, not always!!

    I do think he is a normal toddler but in some ways worse than others and has trouble keeping his attention during group activities especially. What do I do? I don't think pulling him away from the class at those times will necessarily be the best course of action as won't he just learn that you quit when things get hard or boring? He often bounces back within 5-10 minutes and re-joins the group.

    It stresses me out - any ideas?

    Sorry a bit long! Just kept typing away while he is asleep!

  2. #2
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    My DD1 at just 3 was a little like your son. However I've noticed from 3.5-4 she matured a lot. I also have a 2yo that is such a willful little munchkin that I feel I'm constantly trying to stop her slumping on the floor when she doesn't get her way! Fun times I really have no advice but just wanted to let you know that it got better for us as she grew up a little. Good luck

  3. #3
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    Thank you, I'm sure it will get better. Just knowing someone can relate a little is good. I suppose he isn't the only toddler that plays up like this, some if the others have their moments too. Thanks again

  4. #4
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    My idea is a bit out there.. I am currently doing a 14 week parenting course (1 3hr session per week), I don't have awfully naughty children, BUT they each in their own particular way they like to push my buttons every so often, as children do

    I am on week 8 right now, we have not yet reached the 'consequence' sessions yet, I always assumed naughty behaviour was more likely going to be sorted with consequences or discipline, turns out I was wrong!

    Right now, all four kids are so pleasant and COMPLIANT! I have not had to raise my voice or threaten consequences in the last few weeks. Even with SD3

    And all I've had to do to achieve that, is PLAY with them and praise them!!! I am absolutely gob smacked at the results that those two things have done for my home! Honestly, the first four weeks focused on child lead playing (only 15min play sessions and I only did one play session with each child every week) and praising! I did play with the kids and praise them BEFORE the course, but through the course, I learnt how to do it PROPERLY, to get more bang for ya back as they say!

    I really do highly recommend EVERYONE partake in a parenting class, even if you think you're doing fine as a parent (which is what I thought about myself), good things will happen I LOVE how calm and peaceful my house is, and I never thought I'd say that with 4 hypa over excited attention seeking kids lol


 

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