Thanks @ScubaGal I'll try that today. To not give formula and just BF her. When she cries, she refuses my nipple. How do I make her suck when she's so distressed?
I'm ok with hard work. Just want to make sure I'm not starving her.
I can already sense MHN will tell me off on Monday. It's a cycle. The longer I top up with formula, the harder it is to get her solely on BM only.
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12-12-2015 10:03 #721
12-12-2015 10:09 #722
And yep you've got to put the bottle away it's definitely a problem using anything but your boobs at this stage because it's crucial to supply to let your baby have the nipple.
Basically - sucking is what tells the boobs to make milk. So if baby is sucking on a bottle your boobs miss the cue.
Focus on making yourself comfy, get some tv happening, feed lying down to rest and give baby a chance to establish your supply.
If baby is really unsettled and doesn't want to feed, get dad to pop her in th carrier and go for a walk while you nap or shower.
It will pay off if you persevere now. I promise. Breastfeeding past the three month mark is lovely, comfortable and short. I wish DS would take longer to feed so I could watch tv but they get really efficient later on.
For now, baby on boob.
I promise you aren't starving your baby. Let her have boob only.
12-12-2015 10:24 #723
Ok thanks a lot @ScubaGal I'll give that a go. My biggest fear was she's hungry. I'm going to have a shower now and get ready for next feed at 11 and will stop the bottle so I will probably be feeding around the clock. Lucky my parents have been dropping off food for us.
12-12-2015 10:26 #724
12-12-2015 10:45 #725
Her suction will get stronger as she does.
Just feed on demand. Offer the boob frequently, if she's unsettled you have to calm her first before she will latch.
Perhaps look into a breastfeeding class at your local hospital or maybe read the ABA website or call their support line.
It's really important to get your information from trusted sources.
And pack the bottles and dummies away for now, they'll do more harm than good.
If your baby gets hungry, she will suck more, signalling the boobs to make more milk.
It's that simple.
Other than that - it's a big transition to being out of the womb so expect some unhappiness from her and just try to keep her environment as womb like as you can.
Bit of background noise, movement walking around and low lights.
Lots of skin to skin is also great for establishing breastfeeding, so shirt off to cuddle and feed.
You can also try cuddling her in a warm bath.
Congratulations by the way.
12-12-2015 10:51 #726
12-12-2015 11:04 #727
12-12-2015 11:18 #728
Just breastfeed on demand. You can do it and it's SO SO SO worthwhile.
Don't let anyone get in your head about how often/when to feed.
Just feed on demand. Baby knows what to do.
After all the IVF it's just been so wonderful for me to breastfeed and not need any other interventions with feeding. You can do it.
At your baby's age no amount of boob is too much boob.
Just get your DH to work bringing you water and snacks and magazines and sign up for Netflix.
12-12-2015 15:50 #729
Hi @Minib I'm feeling pretty good thanks but can't believe in 2.5 days I'll have an answer. The 2ww has been a lot easier this time as ive had lots to keep me busy at this time of year. Not sure if it also helps that I've done the wait before but I think the 2ww might be a little tougher during a fresh cycle as they are more intense and then during the wait, you feel like you're doing nothing but waiting! This cycle it's been more waiting than action. Did you find that with fresh vs frozen? I'm sure if helps that I have DD now too.
As for breastfeeding, you're bringing back a lot of memories for me. I had to do formula top ups during my hospital stay as DD got to 5 days old and my milk still hadn't come in so she was well and truly starving. She was going slightly yellow so they suspected jaundice. She was tested but didn't have it thankfully but it meant I needed to keep her well hydrated. Once day 6 came around, my milk was in and I tried to go on without formula and it worked for the next month. I felt like things were going perfectly and we'd worked things out! I also felt no discomfort with feeding, it was like you described. I'd heard of bubs mixing day and night but didn't have to contend with that so have no advice. My DD wanted to feed a lot til 11pm-ish every night and would then sleep til 4am, wake for a feed and then back to sleep for a couple more hrs. I just happened that way but I think the clustering til late at night filled her up for a big overnight sleep.
I'd heard that the 6 week mark is tricky for feeding as bub goes through a massive growth spurt and is wanting to feed constantly. I really doubted myself at this stage and felt like she was completely draining me and still wanting more. I know breasts are never empty but I really felt I had nothing more to give. I also had no expressed supply to give her as I'd be the one who would pump for 30mins and get 30 ml, it would take me days to fill a bottle so it wasn't worth it. After a week of battling with the 6 week spurt, we gave in and gave one bottle of formula a night. It was at that time that we progressively started to mix feed as once you start regular bottles for a full feed, especially since that initial stage, it can be really hard to go back. One lady from mothers group went back to exclusive breast feeding after mix feeding but I don't know how she managed it. I found that once DD was 2mths old, she was having 2 bottles a day and 4 breast feeds. I really liked that routine as it gave me a break. It lasted like that for a month until she started to fuss with breast feeding as she was getting used to filling up with bottles so we went to 3 of each for another couple of weeks until she fussed again. Leading up to her turning 4mths, I was more or less only doing 2 feeds a day and the rest was formula. The day she turned 4mths she completely refused the breast in favour for the bottle. I was sad that it had to end but I know the bottle kept me sane to an extent. I felt completely drained and unsure when breastfeeding and it didn't help that DD was a slow weight gainer so I felt like if was continually starving her regardless of the fact that she slept well so must have been content, I just couldn't see how she could be since she was only just scraping in with 90- 100g weight gains a week.
My DD used to be a slow feeder as well so I'd take at least an hr each feed, she never got quicker. From what I've gathered they really do need to be on the breast continually in the beginning but my DD was never hugely demanding so that would have affected my supply and therefore we couldn't feed for the long term. We used a dummy, which meant she slept well and was happy not to be on me continuously so that may have played a part in it too but then again, I was a dummy baby and my mum fed me right through, so this isn't always the case.
When it comes down to it, persevering with breastfeeding is rewarding and I'm glad I tried really hard to stick it out. I found it hugely overwhelming but still wanted to try my best and will do the same again and hopefully go even longer next time around. I've learnt a lot about giving in to the bottle rather than just pushing through the 6 week hungry phase and trusting your body. Now I've been through it once, I'll try and push through even harder next time. I don't fully regret the bottle though as being a first time mum, I was so beside myself with the feeding- even hubby says that breastfeeding was the hardest thing about having a newborn and he obviously wasn't even doing it! Giving her the bottle did end up making me feel more relaxed, calm and enjoy her even more than I was. It's not all bad and she's a healthy and flourishing toddler now, who instead of being on the 10th percentile in weight, she is exactly 50th percentile.
Sorry for the long post but I guess what I'm trying to say is, prepare yourself for the 6 week mark and trust yourself and see if you can push through without using bottles, as unfortunately in my experience it does lead to full formula feeding. However, if anytime you feel like it's too much, it's totally ok to have a bottle fed baby and as I said, I have no regrets now as I know I gave it my best shot and when it comes down to it, she was happy and fed
Last edited by Annerley; 12-12-2015 at 15:56.
12-12-2015 19:02 #730
@Annerley fingers crossed for a BFP in 2.5 days. Have you been POAS-ing at home?
Definitely more waiting in FET cycle. Can be quite frustrating as there's not much I could do but wait. However at the same time easier on the body.
My milk came around day 6 too. Unfortunately by this stage Bub has jaundice and lost more than 10% of body weight hence the top up.
I've also heard 6 week mark is the tough one.
So this arvo I've been feeding her pretty much non stop without formula top up. She is upset and unsettled.
BF is hard! That's all I can say. I am going to give it my best shot. But will keep an open mind in case things don't go as plan.
You did well annerley to BF as long as you can. I haven't even done one whole day of BF only since day 4.
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