Ok don't get me wrong I adore the pants of my DD. but I can't keep doing these nights. I'm at breaking point every night and even broke down crying last night in the midst of it.
I don't know what to do. Is it normal. Should we be expecting less.??
She feeds well and sleeps well all day. Good 2-3 hrs sometimes more- blocks of rest then feeds etc. she is settled and happy.
But come 10/11pm she feeds. And feeds. And feeds and feeds and feeds. She gets milk drunk. But not asleep. If I put her in her basinet next to us she lies for about 1min before fussing and looking for the breast again. So we start all over. This goes on for hours. Last night both df and I were up from 10 till 5 on repeat. Feed. Burp. Lie down. Wake up. Etc etc.
We can't get any rest and its wearing me down. Come 5am she finally slept for a few hrs and then resumed her day time routine of feed and sleep for a few hrs.
Is this cluster feeding? It seems so extreme. I don't know how she isn't just exhausted. And I kind of want to scream when she yawns at me at 3am after not an ounce of sleep for any of us.
I want to keep breastfeeding and stick with it. I worry about using dummies or formula top ups in case it affects my supply. I already had supply issues with DS yrs ago and am very conscious not to have the same problems.
Suggestions, support, advise plse!!!!
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13-10-2013 10:58 #1
1wk old- driving us to the brink
13-10-2013 11:08 #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2013
she is only a week old...i assume you are establishing supply and she is feeding as needed.. unfortunatly i dont think there is much you can do... I formula fed my from 7 days for DS and 3 days for DD and used a dummy for both from day 1..
best of luck, im sure she will settle down as your milk supply settles..
congratulations on your new addition
13-10-2013 11:09 #3
It's normal! Day/ night confusion it sounds like. But oh so normal! The first few weeks with my dd were spent on the recliner dozing together. She slept that way, and I at least dozed.
Have you heard of the 4th trimester? I swear by it.
And you know what? As each week passes it will get easier and easier. Yes, there are some regressions (my dd was up 3 times last night when usually she sleeps through til about 4am, and today she has been in my arms all day) but its to be expected.
And the best part is you've got all of us for support and encouragement when it all feels too much.
13-10-2013 11:13 #4Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2009
Can you try feeding more during the day in the hopes that she will go longer at night. Maybe baby wear so you can still get other things done.
13-10-2013 11:13 #5
1wk old- driving us to the brink
Firstly, she's tiny and new and has no idea what's going on. And it's ok and normal for you to feel the way you do. Sounds to me as if your LO has her days and nights mixed up. Unfortunately I'm not sure there's much you can do at this stage without possibly compromising your milk supply. At this stage if you want to continue BFing, it really needs to be a demand/supply situation. You could maybe try proactive cluster feeding a bit earlier? Often babies sort our their day/night thing in their own time, sometimes they need help. Hopefully other smart hubbers can offer advice on this, it wasn't something I experienced. But I feel your pain, DS2 was an awful sleeper for 12 months so I know that midnight feeling of being overwhelmed all too well. Are you able to catch up on sleep when she sleeps during the day? I found it was easier to go with the flow for the first couple of months, just to see what routine the baby puts themselves in. You could consider co-sleeping as well, if it's something you're comfortable with. This can be in the form of bed sharing, sidecar cot or even cot in the same room if it's not already. On the nights it was all too much, I often brought both DS1 and DS2 into bed just so we'd all get some sleep.
It's hard, but it does get easier (more that you get used to it!). Good luck :-) you're doing a fabulous job.
ETA: I personally didn't have any probs introducing a dummy to both my kids. I BFd both, one to 5 months and one to almost 13 months. The dummy didn't impact it at all.
13-10-2013 11:26 #6
The first six weeks was the hardest. I even sat with dd crying to my dh saying what have we got ourselves into!
She is just working out day and night. As I was expressing the whole time I couldnt just get out my boob to give dd a feed when she was restless but I did give her a dummy which she sucked on for a couple of seconds before going to sleep. But that was the only time she had a dummy.
I know it doesn't seem it now but it will get better!!!!
13-10-2013 11:32 #7
Day night confusion. I was told to not let dd sleep for too long during the day and she'd figure out day and night a lot quicker.
13-10-2013 11:53 #8
It does get better. You need to sleep whenever you can. We had our days and nights confused and it takes a while to work it out. During wake time during the day try and have her awake a little longer every day. It will get better. I had DS on a Dummy from Day 2. Good luck this is an amazing journey.
13-10-2013 11:56 #9
Totally normal. Get bub out in the sunshine during the day esp morning and late afternoon to help set their body clock and get melatonin.
Pls do not introduce dummies and formula if you wish to continue bf.
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13-10-2013 12:02 #10
Oh I remember feeling exactly the way you did. It did pass but it felt like an eternity. Are you able to feed her lying down so she can nap and snack and you can doze as well? It was the only thing that worked for us. Hang in there - it's a wonderful thing you are doing for your DD...
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