I wouldn't even support his decision to no longer financially support his own child(ren) let alone donate sperm to his ex on top of that!
View Poll Results: Would you allow your partner to be a sperm donor for his ex?
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29-09-2013 06:17 #11
29-09-2013 06:18 #12
I wouldn't be okay with him no longer paying child support. It doesn't make sense to me. Plus the ex could change her mind down the track and he could then be paying child support for two children (rightfully so).
I think there would be too much involved and I wouldn't feel ok about a hypothetical partner doing this. But it'd be his decision entirely.
As a person with children to my ex whom I completely adore (the kids not him) I wouldn't even contemplate it. If I desperately wanted another child I'd seek an anon donor myself. It seems a little off to even request given the said ex now has a new partner.
I didn't realise child support was a bargaining tool?? How ridiculous!! I'd definitely look down the the woman asking and even more so on my partner contemplating ridding himself of financial responsibility. Makes me sad for the children involved.
29-09-2013 06:25 #13
No, three in the bed is too many. Given that donor sperm is available now, she has other options she can access if having a child is really important to her.
29-09-2013 06:27 #14
29-09-2013 06:33 #15
29-09-2013 06:33 #16
Hell no! That's the stupidest thing I've heard. Any guy who agrees to that has a screw loose.
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29-09-2013 06:33 #17
But the point is I can't believe people would use giving someone the option of not paying it in return for something else. I can't get my head around it.
It absolutely sickens me when I hear people whinging about their partners having to pay it. I'm sure a different tune would be sung if their own children were no longer supported. But that's a whole different thread.
29-09-2013 06:40 #18
Also I think for most single mums their ex is the last man they'd want to be a sperm donor!
29-09-2013 06:42 #19
I voted no. SO's ex is uBPD and a golden uterus, so she's already a bit of a nightmare to deal with, I wouldn't want to give her another little being to use against SO.
HOWEVER. IF she wasn't such a nightmare, I might've consider it, when I met SO I did think it would have been nice if SD had a full blood sibling and at the time I thought I was done having children. I think it would take a very unique situation for this to work, and all parties would have to be VERY CLEAR about everything before going into it. I don't think CS should be stopped though.
29-09-2013 06:46 #20
We're not a step or blended family but this question is a really good one so I want to stick my oar in, pls disregard if I'm posting out of turn .
I wouldn't be comfortable with that at all (even being asked it would make me so unhappy). We were ttc for 8 years, for someone else to carry DHs child it would just break me (plus I'm sure if other kids are involved and there are regular visits, I'd have to be a step parent to a child my husband conceived while married to me, it's just too hurtful).
On the other hand I can see why someone would want the same father for all their children, but I think you have to let go when your ex has moved onto a new family (asking a single ex for this isn't that unreasonable).
I also second pps concerns over not paying child support, if anything it muddies the waters (and makes it a paid donation which I think isn't too legal in Australia).
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