Gees this sounds familiwr.. my mil and I had a fqlling out the night b4 my wedding.
Then she told off dh till 1am that night so that he only has happy memories of his ladt fee hours at home
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27-10-2013 16:36 #251Senior Member
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- Jun 2009
12-11-2013 13:14 #252
Thanks for checking in
We haven't heard a peep from any of them. Well not after we went to dh's cousins and regretted it so much. Basically mil and fil told her she could not ask us a single question about us or our lives or we would hate her???? So for 2ish hours we have extremely awkward conversation with her, we'd ask how she was/how particular things were going/how people in her life were- she'd answer and then at that point where she was meant to ask how we were going?? Awkward silence. It is so hard to explain but it was so freaking strange. So we bailed pretty quickly. Left a pretty sad and sour taste in our mouths.
Dh is coping really well with it all- I'm starting to get scared about Christmas and the baby being born but trying to just go with the flow....
Me 27 + Him 28 =
#2 due 28.1.2014
6 angels loved and missed.
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12-11-2013 18:30 #253
Mummy of Max 2 from donor eggs from my lovely sister.
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12-11-2013 19:28 #254
They really do. But I'm happy to be sure that they are their problems and not ours. They have brought all this on themselves and there is nothing we can do about it. Balls in their court, but we all know they'll never play....
12-11-2013 20:05 #255Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2012
Hi I missed the start of all this but have just been reading. I really hope they give up and i'm pretty sure they will. What you've been through is very very similar to what we went through with Dh's parents. He decided to cut them off (even though they are 100% sure that I made him ) and they continued to contact us everyway possible and get grandparents etc to write letters saying how disappointed everyone was in him/us they finally gave up after 3 years and now we have no contact from them at all. It's so nice and peaceful now and I hope you get to that stage soon too. I have no idea what I tell the kids when they are old enough to realise they are missing a whole side of the family. sometimes family just sucks
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06-12-2013 05:48 #256
Wondering if this IL situation is as upsetting and annoying as it feels...
Wow, just wow. I just read this whole thread and my goodness you are not in the wrong at all, they are batcrap insane. All of their behavioral problems and manipulation aside, right about the time they admitted things were actually worse with BIL than you even know and are still protecting him was when I truly started to loathe them. I understand wanting to stand by your son and that is admirable in itself but not at the expense of innocent children, particularly when those innocent children are your grandchildren. Standing by him in my mind means continuing to see him after he's imprisoned for what he's done, not wrangling access to more possible victims for him. Disgusting.
That's not even getting into how they crossed the line with barging in at the hospital and the "birthday party" they threw for DD against your wishes. They can't even accept responsibility for the fact that they were out of line with these things. I see them as lesser transgressions than the absolute no-go of them wanting to give BIL access to your children but they are nonetheless awful and would be enough for anyone to be seriously annoyed and want to set solid boundary lines for the future.
Last edited by Apple iPhart6; 06-12-2013 at 05:53.
07-12-2013 06:23 #257
It's also that they are standing by one son at the expense of one of their other one. I don't know how as parents you'd feel or choose.... But I kinda feel like your son who has done no wrong and is the father of your only grandkids might be a better choice?? But no, apparently not.
After 2 months of nothing, they texted us last weekend. By they I mean dh's mum pretending to be his dad (wtf???). She said they are waiting for us to contact them and fix everything and wanted to make sure we weren't waiting for them to do anything because they weren't. :-O Hubby replied saying the ball is in their court, we won't engage in any further discussions until they address some of the issues raised etc. She replied saying that 'we are allowed to disagree' and they won't be changing or doing anything. That they have been generous and amazing to us and we have been horrible in return. We haven't replied again. On what planet do they have any right to 'disagree' with us on how we will raise and protect our kids??? Neither of us are even horrified anymore. Just the same old crap....
07-12-2013 06:54 #258
I'm glad your husband is standing with you even though it must be hard for him. It would be lonely and a bit scary if he saw nothing wrong with it all.
Um I suppose they have a right to disagree with small things but exposure of your child to a sexual predator....ummm no
Hopefully they are so stubborn they just disappear in spite which by the sounds of things will be the best for you and your family.
I hope this childbirth is much more relaxing for you!!!
08-12-2013 07:53 #259
I think you surprised them by not grovelling for forgiveness. I hope life has been much more relaxing and pleasant without them.
Best not to engage in any more texts back and forth. They know where you stand now, anything more will just encourage them.
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08-12-2013 09:42 #260
Sadly, I predict you'll be getting more of these texts as it gets closer to Christmas. It'll be your fault for keeping the kids away from them at the holidays. I honestly wouldn't even tell them about the birth of your belly bub and like you said, no announcements till you're safely home and can refuse to see them. I would consider moving house but staying within the same area so you still have your family. Although, if it's a small town that might not really work anyway.
ETA: I would seriously consider changing your phone numbers, though.
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