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  1. #1
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    Default Do you encourage your children to invite both girls and boys to their party?

    DS is only 3, so of course I invited all the children from his kindy to his party, and in fact his best friend is a girl.

    But I wonder about when he is older. I'd like to think I will encourage him to invite girls to his parties also, no matter the theme (although I'm not really into themes and prefer to mix it up, but DS may be as he grows). Even if he says "I don't want smelly girls to come" I think I'd probably hit the roof and tell him to change his attitude! I'm just like that.

    I hate gender stereotypes but of course it exists everywhere.

    I always mixed with both girls and boys at school and throughout my adulthood. It wasn't until I met my ex that I was suddenly in a situation where the boys did one thing while the girls did another thing. I hated it! I didn't get it.

    I am of the feeling children should be encouraged to befriend others based on their qualities, not their gender - but of course like I said DS is only 3 so I haven't been through this gender stuff yet.

    Thoughts?

  2. #2
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    Not encourage, but my kids have friends of both genders. I find it a little strange when I hear of children's parties that are all one gender.

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    My boy is too young now to worry about that: he hasn't turned 3 yet and doesn't have any 'best friends.' When he is older I will encourage him to be friends with boys and girls but if that doesn't happen so be it. I won't force him to invite girls to his party if he is not friends with them.

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    Unless there is some deliberate exclusionary behaviour (I want everyone except X to come to my party) I think I will generally be led by DD.

    If she wants an all girls party then so be it.

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    DD1 is turning 8 this weekend. I left the invite list to her, but she has a limit on numbers. She's invited all girls plus one boy. She has friends of both sexes but hangs with girls more. She's had male friends all her life but now tends to have more in common with her girl friends.

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    No, my kids invite who they want.
    My DS1 only likes boys.
    My DD only likes girls.
    My DS2 likes boys and girls. His party was last week. When we were writing the guest list I asked him to rattle off 10 names, turns out 5 were boys and 5 were girls! I was pretty chuffed with my friendly boy. I must say though that there was quite a divide at the party though, they really didn't mix genders much. So I won't mind if he only invites boys next year.

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    Interesting... I guess I'll be fighting a losing battle against the masses. Even if DS does chuff me as your lovely little man CMF, I can hardly expect all the other kids to comply and think the same way.

    Strange how it was never a 'thing' in my childhood... Always always played with both boys and girls, even in high school.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Fleetwood View Post
    Interesting... I guess I'll be fighting a losing battle against the masses. Even if DS does chuff me as your lovely little man CMF, I can hardly expect all the other kids to comply and think the same way.

    Strange how it was never a 'thing' in my childhood... Always always played with both boys and girls, even in high school.
    I don't think you need to fight anyone except your own children if they happen to have a different guest list to the one you have in mind?

    DD plays with boys and girls at preschool but I don't see that that automatically has to flow through to her parties if she doesn't want it to.

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    We don't do parties but my kids go to parties of the opposite gender. Ds is going to a girl's party next week.

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    Quote Originally Posted by NancyBlackett View Post
    I don't think you need to fight anyone except your own children if they happen to have a different guest list to the one you have
    I did say encourage, not force! I will always try to encourage him to think outside the square, but I would never fight him for his own decisions. Does that make more sense??


 

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