When you do the sex talk/talks will you talk about sex in the media?
Where the boundaries lie?
How in media there seems to be a sense that no doesn't mean no until she is screaming and bleeding etc?
What will you talk to them about beside the physical insert P3nis here type things?
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19-08-2013 10:58 #1
Spin off* When you do the sex talk/talks will you talk about sex in the media?
19-08-2013 11:02 #2
Always. No set time. We don't want them desensitise by the media which is why we don't have tv and limit other forms too.
Just as it comes up (no pun intended)
Constant dialogue from a young age. Gotta get in first.
19-08-2013 12:25 #3Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2009
Always...we talk as it get brought up. We talk about body parts from birth...and it means there is nothing "off limits".
I told my DS (9)last week what sex actually was because he referred to it as something totally different (he said sex was kissing when you shouldn't be) and I wanted to clear that up straight away.
TBH he was gob smacked by the idea (i kept it simple...checked he was confident in understanding what an e.rec.tion was and then explained that sex was when you put your p.enis into a girls v.agina.
We spoke about how it was something special you did when older, that it was fun (he seemed unconvinced lol), we spoke about fore.play a little and that there was lots of stuff you did with someone you liked before you got to full s.ex but did not go into exactly what that was. We spoke about how s.ex made babies and that each time you have it you might make one so there are precautions you can take (again not into detail yet).
He has a "secret book of boys business" that he has read with rapt attention...i'll be getting him a where did i come from (or something similar) soon.
I want him to know the facts from me...and not rely on misinformation from friends or what is portrayed in movies/film clips.
He has asked a few more questions since finding out what s.ex was...and they have all been answered honestly and positively.
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19-08-2013 12:29 #4
I am quite open and honest with my children already about anything to do with their bodies etc. I don't tell BS stories about the stork or a cabbage patch and if they ask how babies get in your belly I tell them in an age appropriate way what really happens. I don't think we will specifically talk about sex and media, however if and when it arises I will openly chat with them about the realities. (I so wish someone would have told me sex is nothing like in the movies, perhaps then I wouldn't have been soo disappointed when my first time hurt and was uncomfortable and well lacking that lip biting, toe curling moment you see in every movie hahaha)
19-08-2013 12:33 #5
I think I'll do the same as you river.
So far, we haven't had the talk with ds1. He is 7 but hasn't raised any queries. When they do come up (or we notice a curiosity) we'll approach the subject honestly and age appropriately.
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19-08-2013 18:32 #6
My kids know that it's not always toe curling but it can be. IYKIM
If i don't tell them realities dd certainly will That's what she wants to do when she is finished uni.
In our house it has always been a open ongoing subject. It always will be.
I really worry that our kids are going to think that is what is expected of them.
I worry that they are getting mixed messages from the media regarding no means no. Often you see that the girls says no and gives in. Or the guy doesn't get it unitl she screaming or hurt in fighting him off.
19-08-2013 20:15 #7Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2012
I think it's really important to talk to kids, especially boys, about the differences between porn/media and real sex. It scares me that they will have access to xxx porn on any electronic device. In our era the boys might have been able to sneak a VHS or a playboy. Now they have access to literally anything on a small device that gives them lots of privacy in accessing content. I want my boys to have a good grasp on how women are treated before they are exposed to that type of material. Hard stuff! (No pun intended!)
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