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  1. #1
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    Default Concerned for a friend but should I be wary?

    Long story so try to keep it brief. Friend I met years ago...went to the same church. Two years ago she went through a divorce and while I was happy to help support her she began phoning me at early hours of the morning and not allowing me to breathe. It was all about her problem and she never bothered to listen to me or ask how I was doing. So the friendship was very much one-sided.I stopped answering my phone and she decided to drop on my doorstep at night(when we were having our dinner). I felt like she was overstepping my boundaries. I knew she was hurting but she began to flirt with my DH(in order to hurt me) when she came in the door. I told her later it was not on and we stopped contact for two years.I ran into her in the shopping centre the other day. I had heard that she had met a man online and skyped him for five weeks. She shared her story. She went over to the USA and married him after five weeks of skyping. They were married in a Registry office. I was shocked but realised she was desperate to be married. As she is nearing 50 years of age, I thought that she may use some wisdom. She has left him three times and this is the third time. He is not a nice person, but now I am wondering if she is similar.She has changed in personality and has told me that she wants to marry again and will look for another man. But what is alarming me is this: A dear friend of ours(whom she knows as well) was married for seven months and only a month ago he lost his wife in a car crash.He is a lovely guy and is grieving immensely. She has told me she is interested in him. He is very financially secure and comes from a good family. I think it's all wrong and I am now disgusted in her. She has phoned me three times since Sunday with the download of her past two years. It is all about her She hasn't really listened to my struggles of the past two years and I have been through a lot myself. But it seems her problems are greater. She has this desire to be married and said that she is looking for a man that will MEET ALL of HER NEEDS. I told her that he doesn't exist. And a good relationship is about giving as well. I do care for her but I don't like her behaviour and I don't want her over-stepping my boundaries. Should I be wary of her? How can I care but not allow her to over-step my boundaries or, should I just forget her altogether. I must say my life was peaceful the past two years without her. Your thoughts - thanks.
    Last edited by littlebopeep2013; 30-07-2013 at 16:39.

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    If you don't want her bothering you like last time then stop engaging her.

    Tell her to back off your friend then stop answering her phone calls. She will get the message again.

    Good luck

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    I would definitely back away from this person.

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    Sounds like she is way too much effort....I'd walk away and I would warn this guy that she has her eyes on ...

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    Quote Originally Posted by lovepurplebutterflies View Post
    Sounds like she is way too much effort....I'd walk away and I would warn this guy that she has her eyes on ...
    This. run for the hills!
    If you can, somehow, descretely and sensitively talk to the guy...even just a heads up....if you can, without causing drama with her.

    Sent from my GT-S5830T using The Bub Hub mobile app


 

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