+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 17 of 17
  1. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    6,514
    Thanks
    5,910
    Thanked
    4,931
    Reviews
    21
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    If you truly want to marry this man, it doesn't matter if it's early next year or 5 years from now, as long as you are happy.
    I would be postponing until you're sure.

    I think it's only fair that you share expenses, he needs to realise you're a family.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    4,765
    Thanks
    1,903
    Thanked
    2,791
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I don't think those are small issues. Money is one of the most common reasons marriages fail. If there are issues now then I would definitely get them sorted before even considering going ahead with the wedding.

    I suppose above all I would be concerned that he doesn't WANT to contribute financially - what could be more important to him than supporting his child?

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    765
    Thanks
    50
    Thanked
    95
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Well well well he went to the mall with his Mum and must have known he was pushing my buttons lately and he came home with a card written on behalf of baby saying I'm the best mummy in the world and some chocolates, lotto and scratchie.
    So it's a start and a good opener to discuss this joint account again!

    I don't expect him to change over night but if I can get him to pay the 50% of costs I will be happy.

    I guess I need to see a fast improvement over the next mth to go ahead with the wedding. I do need to be honest with him too and tell him my concerns.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    1,581
    Thanks
    748
    Thanked
    733
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    How he is behaving is really unfair & isn't a partnership.

    However & I say this with love😀he behaves this way as you have let him get away with it. It's started out in small ways & rolled into big ways of acting like a douche & getting away with it.

    I've been there & done that & NEVER again, there are plenty of other men out there who aren't like this.

    What to do from here? Decide on your boundaries, write a list of what you want, need & expect. Keep referring back to your list & give him a kick up the a$$ every time he strays from your list.

    You should be kicking back & enjoying your hard to get bub x

  5. #15
    BH-KatiesMum's Avatar
    BH-KatiesMum is offline Community Manager
    Winner 2008 - The most optimistic poster
    Winner 2014 - Most Helpful Moderator
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Perth WA
    Posts
    23,290
    Thanks
    5,901
    Thanked
    6,322
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    Past Moderator
    200 Posts in a week100 Posts in a week
    to be honest, I would approach him and say "now that we are getting married, and have a baby together ... lets pool all of our money into 1 bank account"

    Talk about the financial commitments you have as a family, what you are prepared to spend on what and work out together your financial path ...

    then, if you cant work things out perhaps think about postponing the wedding

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    765
    Thanks
    50
    Thanked
    95
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Success! Maybe I am part of the problem I do need to pick the right time to discus things...we have adjusted our automatic payments into our joint acc so bubs is fully covered!
    Thanks for the support.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Posts
    407
    Thanks
    12
    Thanked
    148
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by chances View Post
    Success! Maybe I am part of the problem I do need to pick the right time to discus things...we have adjusted our automatic payments into our joint acc so bubs is fully covered!
    Thanks for the support.
    Great! I'm glad he's agreed to share the load financially. All the best for the future!


 

Similar Threads

  1. Cold feet somedays?
    By tw1nmummy in forum Conception & Fertility General Chat
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 12-12-2012, 20:16
  2. Cold feet somedays?
    By tw1nmummy in forum Conception & Fertility General Chat
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 12-12-2012, 14:05
  3. Cold feet somedays?
    By tw1nmummy in forum Conception & Fertility General Chat
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 12-12-2012, 14:04

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
FEATURED SUPPORTER
Prams and StrollersLooking to buy a pram or stroller? :: Viewer reviews of prams :: Pram Buyers ...
FORUMS - chatting now ...
House clothes/cleaning clothesGeneral Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
Noble NovemberConception & Fertility General Chat
Delightful DecemberConception & Fertility General Chat
Embryo qualityIVF Newbies - What you want to know
REVIEWS
"Made bed time less anxious"
by Meld85
My Little Heart Whisbear - the Humming Bear reviews ›
"Wonderful natural Aussie made product!"
by Mrstwr
Baby U Goat Milk Moisturiser reviews ›
"Replaced good quality with cheap tight nappies"
by Kris
Coles Comfy Bots Nappies reviews ›