Mrs T, I'm sorry to hear you've had a fight. My fiancé is much the same, he works hard all week (nights) then has Fridays off and he just lets loose. I'm all for enjoying yourself and having a few beers with his mates but he writes himself off! I get cranky and just leave him wherever he is and come home to bed he usually comes knocking on the door at some ungodly hour and crawls into bed. I get pretty cranky at him when he acts like a d**k but he apologizes the next day and I can't stay mad... TBH I let it go pretty easily, I do worry that he will think it can continue after we have kids (one of the blokes he drinks with has 3 LO's at home and has a bit of a drinking problem) but I can assure you I won't be putting up with that! I would suggest that you pull him up on the drink driving and let him know that it's not on for not only his safety but everyone else's but this may just be the way he lets go of the stress of the week and unwinds?
Results 131 to 140 of 911
27-07-2013 08:32 #131
27-07-2013 09:01 #132
I apologise if my reply seems like it was backing him up.. I think you just need to be clear about what you expect of him. That yeah it's ok to go out and drink but he has to answer his phone (what if there's an emergency?) and if he says he's going to be home at a certain time, be home or contact you so you're not sitting at home worried. Men are usually oblivious to what we want or really mean sometimes you really have to spell it out for them.. My DF is 28 and I still have to occasionally remind him he's not 18 anymore. I don't think they ever really grow up lol
27-07-2013 09:03 #133
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27-07-2013 09:18 #134
I'm sorry to hear it was a hard night Mrs T! He's got it too good with you Hopefully he will realise he is hurting you and the potential very serious consequences of his actions...what if he hit someone drink driving...his whole life would be over! I don't think ppl think of that when they dd...I guess otherwise they wouldn't do it! I feel for you and hope you come to a resolution. BIG HUGS
27-07-2013 10:04 #135Junior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2013
Hugs Mrs T. Sounds very frustrating indeed, and the drink driving is what would push me over the edge. I agree, you need to explicitly say what you expect, cause sometimes men need it spelt out to them!
In terms of names etc, for our boys we have used names that aren't popular, but are easy/phonetically spelt (so not made up names/spelling) and can't be shortened/nicknamed, and we give them 'normal' middle names. So we will stick with those same rules for our next baby too.
For girls I'm loving Violet, Hazel & Eleanor
For boys I love Hugo & Wyatt
And we always keep the name a secret until baby is born
27-07-2013 10:47 #136
Hi guys thanks for your support it means a lot.
27-07-2013 10:57 #137
Whoops hit send lol :0
Yes Vonnie I think u hit the point exactly when u said need to remind them they aren't 18 any more. I understand drinking and having fun is a part of life, but he can't think he can get away with this when we have kids, and I have explicitly told him this.
He knew before this that it is strictly forbidden to get in the car with a DD, or to DD himself. We have discussed it before, and I've made it clear how serious I am on that topic, and he has made it clear he understands.
But once he's had too much his brain just completely leaves the building. He comes home late because he "doesn't realise how late it is". He doesn't answer his phone because he "didn't realise it was ringing". It drives me insane, because how can u fix that??? He just gets a serious case of idiot when he's drunk.
He isn't intentionally doing anything wrong, but we get in a fight, and he apologises and says he will do better, and then next time it happens all over again.
Like time, for example. If he is getting his own way home, we will usually say midnight or 1am curfew. If I am driving to get him, I'll make it more like 11. Here's an example;
Me- I'm pretty tired tonight so 11 at the latest to get u
DH- NOOO make it 12 please
Me- come on, I'm the one staying awake for u, 11!
DH- ok fine 11, that's fair
*rings DH at 10.55 to say I'm on my way. No reply. No reply. No reply. Get there, knock on door*
DH- but I'm not ready to go! U said 12! I have another whole hour!!
Sigh... It's like dealing with a retarded 6yo I'm not even kidding.
Sorry to lay all this on u guys, it's hard to talk to my friends cos they don't help they just judge him and look at me with pity and I wang neither of those :-/
27-07-2013 11:01 #138
On names, I have a few favourites that have been in my head for a while. DH is going to be a difficult one to deal with in this situation, he has me er liked a name I choose but he can't ever give me one he likes instead lol :-/
We will 100% not be revealing names until birth announcement. I wouldn't handle people's judgement. I don't care what they think, it's not their kid, but still. They can just wait their turn :-)
And I think honestly a name should never be a definite until you're holding the baby in ur arms. Only then do u really know!!
27-07-2013 11:16 #139
27-07-2013 12:19 #140
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