One of my friends told be that my Ex is in Sydney (we are from Brisbane).
Now I’m really irritated that either he’s moved there, or he’s having a great time holidaying. He decided that because we couldnt be together, he didnt want to be a "part-time dad". We haven't seen or heard from him in almost two months.
It just annoys me to NO END that he can just walk out of our DDs life like that. It also gives me the sh*ts that he gets to go and and have fun and be young, while I’m stuck looking after our child. Who do I have to be the responsible one? We both wanted to have her.
Its not fair that just because it didn’t work out between us, he gets to just walk away from his responsibilities. What really, really annoys me is that I am going to put in all the hard yards with DD now on my own; and in a few years, he could just waltz back into her life and she’ll worship the group he walks on because he’s her dad. And she’ll always hate me because I’m her mum and the rule-maker.
Its f**king b*llsh*t!
Most of the time, I'm happy because I know we are both much better off now. But every now and again this uncontrollable rage wells up out of nowhere and I just want to find him, strangle him, then run him over with my car a couple of times. If only it wasnt illegal
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11-07-2013 09:58 #1
11-07-2013 10:03 #2
What a douche!! I know how you feel but your DD will love and appreciate everything you do and have done for her, she will!
11-07-2013 10:05 #3
I have this exact same situation with my ex. Makes your blood just boil, doesn't it?
I can totally empathise.
11-07-2013 10:11 #4
I feel for you.. My ex was the same. Had a lot of bitterness towards me and couldn't separate that from being a dad and not using the kids as weapons/blackmail. He disappeared for a year, then got back in contact demanding to see the kids and have them unsupervised (ds wouldn't have even remembered him!) I said he had to start off with small supervised visits to build a relationship back up, he refused and tried to power trip me, I went and applied for sole custody so he couldn't keep doing this, and I won it (he has a bad history with his other 2 children and he didn't even show up for the court hearing).
I haven't heard from him in 2 years since then but at least I know if he does decide to just waltz back in again, it will be my way or highway, he can't just expect to pick up where he left off with them years ago. Chances are he won't find me anyway!
11-07-2013 10:39 #5
OP, I know exactly how you feel.
My ex DH is currently holidaying in Vietnam with his new wife and their 2 kids. He hasn't seen DS since April 2009 when he walked out on us and moved to Melbourne. It amazes that he can afford to take his new family on an overseas holiday yet he can't afford the $500 for flights to SA to see his son.
Every time I asked him if he was going to see ds he would either say he can't afford it, or he wants to bring his whole family over, the new wife and kids all at once. I told him you can't just bring strangers into ds life, as doesn't cope we'll with new people, and that your practically a stranger to him as well as you have been out of his life for so long, but he just won't accept that. He says I'm keeping ds from him and his family and that I should take ds to Melbourne to see them.
He's the one who walked out on our marriage not giving me any warning, and went overseas to Vietnam within a week for 3 months and meeting his future wife and getting her pregnant.
As far as I see it he's the one missing out on seeing DS and that it's his loss and one day he will regret it, but that day may come too late for him to form any relationship with ds.
"Oh, well I never, was there ever a cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees"
11-07-2013 11:14 #6
All the other single dads that I know have fought tooth and nail to remain part of their kids lives after separation.
Not that I thought I was the only one with a deadbeat Ex, I just didnt realise it was so common! It just blows me away that there are so many irresponsible men out there!
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11-07-2013 11:28 #7
My DD has seen her bio farther once since she was 10months old, she's now 2.5
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