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  1. #21
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    Not too much she could be a little bit but nothing compared to my MIL who still cleans BIL room , makes his bed, wash iron folds & puts away his clothes, makes his lunch for work & dinner, & he does nothing around the house at all his gf also lives there & Has everthing done for her too. & they whinge about paying $80 fortnight board. He's 26 still being babied. MIL works 80+ hours a fortnight & does everything for BIL& his gf. They're planning on buying a house & moving out some time in near future I find this hilarious as they're gunna fall flat on their faces with no one to do everything for them

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    bahahaha. my SIL is 28 and is even more babied op. She gets driven to work in her own car by dad, her lunch made for her, her parents pick her up from work if she gets her period, her parents leave weddings, christenings - even immediate family ones IE: grandchild, if she gets her period or a headache to go sit at home with her, they leave weddings to drive her to a friends party - yet she has her own car and licence.. aargh.. I could go on forever. she never complains about it tho. I find it weird at that age where you would think you would want your independence, not having mummy and daddy jumping hoops for you, even putting your washing away in drawers.. seriously lazy.

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  4. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    The fact that your sister thinks it's 'mature' that her daughter is saving for an os trip clinches it for me. Saving for an os trip is not in any way shape or form exceptionally mature behaviour for a 23 year old. That your sister brags how 'mature' she is because of it tells me that neither of them are particularly mature.
    I'm confused as to why saving for quite an $$$ trip isnt mature? I know quite a lot of 23 year olds who simply get credit cards to do so turn struggle to pay it off once they return. Now that is not mature.

    I don't think it's parent brag worthy though lol!

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    The only one that is confusing to me is number 1. I can't figure out why a 23 year old would want someone else to pack their suitcase. Unless she picks out her clothes and her mum is the one that is literally packing her suitcase, because I can understand that. I suck at packing suitcases so DH does that, I just put everything I need out and he puts them in.

    I have a mum that has hardly done anything for me since I was old enough to do it myself. Sometimes I wish my mum was more like your sister. While I am busy taking care of everyone else, it would be nice if sometimes someone would take care of me.

  6. #25
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    I have a friend who is 31 and her Mum cooks for her, checks her uni assignments for her and buys her clothes and toiletries. She is married with a toddler! I find it weird personally but her family has always been a bit enmeshed!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Uh-Oh View Post
    I'm confused as to why saving for quite an $$$ trip isnt mature? I know quite a lot of 23 year olds who simply get credit cards to do so turn struggle to pay it off once they return. Now that is not mature.

    I don't think it's parent brag worthy though lol!
    Totally agree! I was living out of home and paying rent on my own from 17 but managed to save and travel the world before coming back, meeting DF and settling down. I wouldn't brag that it was "mature" but I am definitely proud that I am 26 have lived overseas and travelled (something I have always wanted to do) and I have absolutely no debt we obviously will when we start building our home next year haha. So glad I didn't just rely on a bit of plastic when I was younger.

    Can I ask what makes someone mature anyway?

    Maybe she is being mature in a different way? Maybe she recognises the emotional needs of her mother and is letting her do what she has to to deal with her child growing up? Maybe?Maybe not? I don't know her. I just think it's good to try and look at it from all sides. It never said that she was asking her mum to do these things. Maybe this is more about her mum than about her? I was the youngest and I was very aware of the adjustment mum had to go through. I didn't yell at her and highlight that I don't need her anymore. That would have been immature of me and also really horrible!


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    I have a friend who is 31 and her Mum cooks for her, checks her uni assignments for her and buys her clothes and toiletries. She is married with a toddler! I find it weird personally but her family has always been a bit enmeshed!

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    They sound really close... The packing is the only one I find a bit weird.

    I'm super close with my mum. I'm 24 and pregnant with number one but my mum still takes me out to the movies and buys me things (or buys baby things more like). She helped me unpack my house when I moved, and bought me a tumble dryer (albeit for my bday).

    I think it's definitely mutually beneficial though, she loves going shopping with me etc. if we go out for lunch she always pays...

    So to me it's not too radical. I am much closer with mum since moving out and we have a fantastic r/ship now.

  10. #29
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    Oh dear... it sounds like maybe she's being mature compared to what she has been.

    At 23 I was married for 2 years, became a mum, was living in overseas from my family, but I've been exceptionally independent since a young age. Whenever my parents do anything for me, I'm shocked (I don't say no though).

  11. #30
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    It's all a bit over the top. It's as though she isn't allowing her daughter to grow up and be independent.


 

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