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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by SuperGranny View Post
    hi meld85, do you think he might have some level of undiagnosed autism?? Im thinking just that he seems to regard his needs above others, and not feel like he is doing anything odd?? Otherwise he is just plain selfish. nice guy, but selfish. Marie.
    Unfortunately some people are like this, and autism isn't the reason.

    My dad sounds like this person (except for missing the birth) if he's tired and we have company, he will just go to bed, if he's hungry he will eat, even if its in front of others. He won't wait.

    My old boss was the same.

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    My DH missed his daughter's birth - he was an interstate driver at the time and she came 6 weeks early. Although there was nothing DH could do he regrets missing it so he has already told his employers that from October (I'm due in Nov) that he is to be on local runs only and will dump the truck if he has to

    My brother fell asleep on a chair in the maternity ward and was abruptly woken by his gf - if she couldn't sleep either could he! He wouldn't have dreamed of suggesting to leave.

    I would be very upset if DH missed the birth by like your friend I would probably try to laugh it off if he did - what else could she do?

  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lambylamb View Post
    Unfortunately some people are like this, and autism isn't the reason.

    My dad sounds like this person (except for missing the birth) if he's tired and we have company, he will just go to bed, if he's hungry he will eat, even if its in front of others. He won't wait.

    My old boss was the same.
    yep I think it is just some peoples ways, I don't think it is malicious etc... It literally doesn't occur to them that the social norm would be to stay up and be tired etc.

  4. #24
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    Unless there is more to this story regarding why this guy is the way he is, I think he sounds quite selfish.

    Missing out on the birth of your first child (or any child), in my opinion, is a really big deal. It's a moment 'not to be missed'.

    He could have just had a nap in the room, surely?

    I would be gutted if my DH did that to me. But I know he never would.

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by SuperGranny View Post
    hi meld85, do you think he might have some level of undiagnosed autism?? Im thinking just that he seems to regard his needs above others, and not feel like he is doing anything odd?? Otherwise he is just plain selfish. nice guy, but selfish. Marie.
    I Agee with pp. sounds like he has severely non existent social skills. Sounds bizarre but his wife is probably used to his behaviour and accepts it

  6. #26
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    I would tie my dp to the hospital bed with a sheet!

    Maybe the woman in labour actually sent him home? Maybe he was annoying her? And she got sick of him and told him to go home? I dunno, there could be a million reasons, why not just ask the mum?!?

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    My DH almost missed our DDs birth, he came in the room after I had pushed out her head, and one CX later her body was out. I had a such a calm, beautiful homebirth that he didn't even realise I was giving birth while he was playing with DS in the next room Didn't bother me though.

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    I agree he sounds quite selfish and self centred even if it may be in an oblivious kind of way. I hope that things change now that he's a dad. Bub and mum are priorities and I hope he realises this. I would be devastated if DH misses the birth!

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    I would be upset if dh missed the birth. He nearly did with our last baby as he was at his mates place after a night on the booze and I couldn't wake any of them up! I woke the entire neighbourhood before they eventually heard me lol

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    I'm not going to lie.... if it were me and DH missed the birth I'd be p!ssed! Actually, more upset, but it would definitely turn into full blown anger at some stage haha.

    Having said that, a lot of people thought it was strange my DH worked the first week after I had DD too. But to me it made more sense for him to use his annual leave when we were out of hospital and could be a lot of help/enjoy the time more. He still visited every night, was just gone during work hours. But he coped a lot of crap from family for it.


 

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