We had a miscarriage at 12 weeks in Jan 2012. My heart hurt like hell for a few weeks before I decided I needed to find a new goal other than ttc (we'd tried for 2.5yrs before becoming pregnant). I applied to do my PhD, which I had been putting off until after babies, and it really helped my mental state to have a new project. As it turned out, I had another BFP the week before starting (now DD).
Talking through my feelings and thoughts was also very important. If you don't have friends and family who can support you, please consider counselling.
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04-06-2013 17:37 #11
05-06-2013 08:34 #12Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2013
Huge hugs, as others have said, be kind to yourself and grieve any which way you want. I've had 2 miscarriages this year so after the second I was pretty messed up. I had the d&c 2 weeks ago and it was all I thought about for the first week and a half afterwards and I cried buckets, 2 weeks on I still think about it a lot, but it's not as constant and I am starting to have moments of feeling happy. Give yourself time and do whatever you need to. I found talking to one of my girlfriends a big help as my DP was supportive but didn't really understand. I also have a SW appointment tomorrow after my obstetrician appointment (to get pathology results from d&c).
06-06-2013 20:09 #13
Thank you so much everybody for your kind words and support.
I cried bucket loads yesterday after having the D&C and it was probably one of the hardest days of my life.
I know time will help me heal but right now my heart is still hurting. Hugging my little girl (she's 2 and the poor thing doesn't understand) a lot has been helping.
I have decided to buy two tiny little teddies to help with the grief.
06-06-2013 21:15 #14Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2013
Sorry to hear of ur loss, I had a natural m/c in April. I still find it hard to accept but time is the only thing that helps, hope ur ok
06-06-2013 21:25 #15
So very sorry for your loss. I've had two m/c's, one just last month. Do whatever you need to do, as it comes. And take as much time as you need. I've heard some people give names to their babies which help them, although personally it's something I haven't done. xxx
06-06-2013 22:08 #16
So sorry for your loss
I had a miscarriage in April where I end up having to have a D&C I would have been about 8 wks.
It was absolutely heartbreaking. I think it never really hit me until I had the D&C, I remember of how final it felt.
I look at my 1 yr old DD and it makes me cherish her even more after going through this.
Be kind to yourself, do something nice that will make you feel good. It does get easier with time.
07-06-2013 09:42 #17Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2012
I am so so sorry for your loss. I was in your exact spot 12 months ago. Losing twins at the same age through a missed miscarriage.
I remember feeling then and am still so so angry now at my body for letting me down twice.
Not growing my bubbas properly and then not knowing how to miscarry which means I now have Asherman's Syndrome from the D&C!
It is awful.
Just take your time. Talk to us all here. Don't let my story or Staf1sh's distress you but use the knowledge that we have learned the hard way to save you time if you have any issues with AF or TTC, post D&C.
I would have gone a bit mad I think last year without my awesome buddies on BH.
Thinking of you. Massive Hugs.
Sent from my GT-I9100 using The Bub Hub mobile app
09-06-2013 16:37 #18
Thank you again everybody.
My husband has to go back to work tomorrow and I'll be home alone with my two year old.
I'm feeling really scared. I don't know why but I don't want to be left alone! 😓
09-06-2013 16:46 #19
09-06-2013 20:51 #20
So sorry for your loss, it's hard but you will get better.
If you don't want to be alone, invite someone over for a visit or maybe to the park? Getting some fresh air can some times help.
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