Any mums and dads of IVF bubs conceived using either donor eggs or sperm want to chat?
I am surprised this isn’t already a thread like this as I know there are quite a few of us out there.
My DD has recently turned 2 (donor sperm) and although I tell her all about the angel who helped us create her she is obviously too young to understand much or ask questions so far. I always wonder what, if anything, others tell their little ones? Any tips??
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19-05-2013 17:26 #1Junior Member
- Join Date
- May 2013
IVF babies conceived using donor sperm or eggs
21-05-2013 18:04 #2
I'm surprised as well. I'm wondering how to approach the issue as well. I'm due in August and would like to start with a 'story book' of our babies story. I have seen some books out there, but not sure how appropriate they are. I am considering buying one to get the idea, but then use it to write my own story.
I'm interested in any other ideas as well.
22-05-2013 15:14 #3
Hi Mumma and DJNette,
I have given a lot of thought to making a book specifically for our DD about her journey into life. I have been collecting photos along the way of my sister (who was ED) and I going through the process, my transfer, her as a 5 day old embryo etc and my pregnancy. I have also asked my FS, OB and Asherman's doctor who were all essential in her creation if they would have photos taken with her when she arrives (in a matter of weeks! ) so we can also put these in the book.
I was thinking of starting out with something simple and age appropriate to perhaps a 2 year old and updating it with developmentally appropriate info as she grows but that is as far as my thinking has gotten.
The main book about I have come across so far is 'Sometimes it takes 3 to make a baby' which is specific to egg donation ' http://www.access.org.au/?p=292 but I would also be interested in other great resources people have come across.
22-07-2013 19:01 #4
I know this thread is a few months old but just stumbled across it.
DH and are using an anon sperm donor. We have decided when finally have our bub we will be completely honest. Not exactly sure how we will tell our child yet.
I have purchased a book 'the pea that was me' its a pic story book for young children. I got from the Book Depository (cheapest place I could find it, cost about $8 with free postage). I am also keeping a journal written to our future child detailing our journey. I thought it would be nice for them to read when older.
One of my best friends is a donor child. She was told when she was in her 20s. She would have liked to have known earlier but understands how hard it was for we parents to tell her.
Good luck to you all
23-07-2013 06:43 #5
Thanks NicErin, I had seen that book on the internet. Just wondering what the language is like for eggs and sperm etc. I want a book I can start reading to bub from the beginning, but I don't want to have to explain concepts that are well above a baby/child until later - but I also don't want some pathetic words that will just confuse people. I realise that I am asking a lot. Mind you for $8 it's probably worth getting anyway.
I have already written the words for my own book, now just waiting on bub's arrival so I can get some photos etc and turn it into the book.
23-07-2013 16:31 #6
Oh writing your own kids book is such a great idea! I might borrow that idea if u don't mind the journal I am writing will be for when they are older.
Will have a read of the pea is me tonight when I get home and will put a bit of it on here. Only part I didn't like from memory was the spelling of Mom instead of Mum as it is American.
23-07-2013 16:50 #7
I am 23 weeks pregnant with a baby boy conceived with anonymous (identity release) donor sperm.
I kept quite a detail diary of our TTC journey which I am going to edit and get bound for when bub is a lot older and more curious. I will include his donor's profile in it too I think.
I'm going to have a look at the books previously mentioned. Great ideas.
23-07-2013 17:01 #8
I'm planning on keeping it very simple. He's 2 now but I always plan on him knowing that Aunty Karen helped make him. So for him it's just a fact and as he gets older he can understand how that help came about and what it means.
23-07-2013 21:16 #9
I am a single mum of a donor child and I go to a monthly support group for single women doing ivf. We were shown some books about donor conception, I purchased one called "A Very Special Baby", the version I got is specifically written for people in my situation as an introductory story for young children born with the help of sperm donation to a single mother, however there is a range of these books that are written for all donor conceived and surrogate children and you can purchase the book that applies to your situation. There is an email address in the back of my book which I think you can try to get hold of these books which is firstname.lastname@example.org
My daughter has just turned 3 and loves alot of books but she isn't interested in this book just yet, she's also not at the point of having any understanding of how she was conceived yet. I have kept all my records and written about my ivf journey to condense it down (as it took 12 ivf attempts over 3 years to conceive her) into a journal for her to read when she's older, I have planned on doing a photo book as well.
Also you might be able to find out through your ivf clinic or donor registery what books may be available.
13-08-2013 10:06 #10
I have dragged myself away from watching my beautiful new baby Hannah sleep, to let you know I found three books at my clinic. They are:
- I'm IVF - Katrina Logan and Geoff Logan
- Sometimes it takes three to make a baby - Kate Bourne
- Our Story - Alison McKee (UK Donor Conception Network)
Hope everyone is having a great day.
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