Just put my DS to bed without dinner. We have struggled with fussy eating for about 8 months and tonight I gave him one of his favourites (there are very few) pasta. Anyway he ate two or three forkfulls and then refused any more. So I did what the "experts" recommend. I took him out of the highchair, gave him about a 20 min break and tried again. He spat it at me so I took it away again gave him a bath and dressed him for bed then tried again he refused again so I said that's it nothing else and put him to bed. I'm not looking forward to the night ahead. How do I get over the feeling that I should have given him something else, even though he probably would have refused that too. I feel awful.
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16-05-2013 19:12 #1
Feel like the worlds worst mummy
16-05-2013 19:19 #2
I did this to my dd a few nights ago. She is in no way a fussy eater. Just being a stubborn almost 3 yr old and I had enough of forcing food all day every day.
She hasnt done it since. Just waiting for a relapse.
She did come out a few times saying she was hungry and as much as it killed me to not give her anything, I just had to stick to it.
Sometimes its all you can do and if there are no medical issues and he's not under weight, don't feel bad. My dd is quite skinny but eats well and I know that. So it was just tough for her.
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16-05-2013 19:20 #3
If he's not eating it, you couldn't have done much more, you tried his favourite three times! I can't offer much advice apart from keep your chin up and try not to beat yourself up over it. Hard I know. One day he will eat heaps, just hang in there. Xx
16-05-2013 19:20 #4Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2011
Your not a bad mummy! Sounds like you have exhausted all avenues! Gbh!
16-05-2013 19:40 #5
I don't really have any expertise but I think your guilt feelings are normal and you shouldn't feel bad you were patient and tried, I'd say he was just testing you, doesn't even sound like he wanted something else as you were offering his fav.
Sounds like its not really about the food but more that its a power struggle between your son and you that manifests in the form of food.
Would he eat if you left him to feed himself? DD is only 13 months but I was having real difficulties feeding her then I decided to just let her feed herself and not even watch her eat... I'll do the dishes or eat my own food, she's a real slow eater but will do really well on her own, if she doesn't like something I just give her cheese and crackers or some fruit which she loves. Kills me sometimes because I know its not a balanced dinner but hey she'll survive! I might be way off because your son is much older and probably vocal about his choices but I maybe it'll help :-)
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16-05-2013 19:48 #6
DS1 goes to bed without dinner (or after only having a couple of bites) most nights of the week. He's decided he "doesn't like it". As in, everything. He's gone from eating everything to being fussy with everything. I put it down to typical almost-3 behavior. He eats well during the day so I don't worry about it.
16-05-2013 19:54 #7
I agree with others OP, you don't need to feel guilty. My kiddies can sometimes be very picky eaters especially my DS. But I dont have the time, money or patience to be making him special separate meals or extra meals cause he won't eat what he is given. So it is a 'if you don't eat it you get nothing' attitude in this house If he hasn't touched any at all I will put it in the fridge and if in half an hour he comes to me saying he is hungry I offer it to him again, otherwise he has to go without... If he were starving he would eat it
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17-05-2013 07:15 #8
Well he still slept through the night so I guess no harm done. I'll have to see if it makes any difference if I keep it up. I am so over the fussy eating thing.
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Turk EnJayDee (17-05-2013)
17-05-2013 09:33 #9
17-05-2013 12:28 #10
OP I had the same issue with my DS this week, except he's only 20mths! I was worried he'd wake too, but didn't.
I felt guilty too, but if he was hungry he would eat. That's what I'm convincing myself anyway. I even offered an alternative favorite that he still didn't want.
I hate him not eating properly, especially when he always used to be a brilliant eater.
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