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  1. #161
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    Thanks preciousone for your lovely message. It was very timely to read as DP has come around a bit - he's not excited (but neither am I) but termination is no longer on the table. I think for him it was big shock and he just wanted it sorted gone quickly, but 6.5 weeks now it's there it's real it'll be hard but we'll deal with it. I think I really only considered termination for him or our family as a whole, he was so unhappy, I didn't want to feel like I was being selfish and not taking him and our family unit into proper consideration. Weirdly I feel worse about it now, suddenly there is no way out and I have to start dealing with the reality and it's quite scary. And morning sickness is kicking in and gees it's hard enough when it's something you really want!! I'm not allowing myself to feel guilty about this ambivalence as I know I will love this child wholeheartedly once it's born. I just have some stuff to work through. The love will be there when it's really important.
    Anyways, thanks for the support, still not ready to tell any friends so it's really appreciated :-)

    Quote Originally Posted by PreciousOne View Post
    Sounds like you are having a tough time Freyamum. I hope you and your partner can come to some of joint decision that you are both happy with. I'm sorry DP isn't coming to terms about the pregnancy, but I think counselling could be beneficial, at least you can both discuss everything with each other with a third party. Be completely honest with him, because once you've terminated it can also be emotionally difficult to deal with down the track. I have been there and regretted it, and I had a .lot of issues to deal with at the time along with bad timing etc. but in hindsight I look back and I guess I felt it was the right thing to do at the time, but had I continued with that pregnancy those issues would have eventually sorted themselves out, and with that regretted my decision and that was 10 yrs ago, although my DP encouraged it, he let me make that final decision. I still feel guilty and sad about that and it all came up again when i had a m/c earlier this year, and i now feel so blessed to be having a baby and so happy that I have been given that chance again. Termination is a very personal decision and you need to find what is right for you, everyone is different and have their own opinions about it. Goodluck and I do really hope that everything works out for you. things have a habit of working out in the end, although it may be a tough journey to get where you want to be, if that makes sense.

  2. #162
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    Freya - so glad things are turning for DH. FWIW even though we did IVF we had been told our chances were slim. So I was geared up for no more children - we'd even consulted our superannuation advisor about starting to plan for early retirement So when IVF succeeded my main mindset until about 14 weeks was "WTF have we just done to our lives" It wasn't about "not wanting" a baby, but simply that my mind had been so totally focused on other things that it was a big shock. Hugs to you

    Jennilee congrats on being 17 weeks. How are you feeling?

    AFM had my 26 week midwife check-in today and have a scan on Thursday at the high-risk unit. Am hoping that all my 'issues' have resolved so I don't have to be classified high-risk but at the same time looking forward to this extra opportunity to see baby

  3. #163
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    How is everyone? I've got a general question about prenatal tests - just wonder what the 40+ group went for? I had planned to do cvs but now I'm thinking this new harmony blood tests + nt scan should be enough? I didn't worry too much about abnormalities with my other kids but I am now I'm 40. I think it's also the unplanned side of things it's going to be hard to have another child now I just don't know if we'd cope with a disabled child.
    Well hope you're all doing well :-)

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    Twocam  (30-10-2013)

  5. #164
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    Hi Freyamum

    I didn't opt for any extra tests. The NT and bloods came back good and I have a 1:450 of a downs child but decided not to have further investigation. My DP talked about it and we didn't want to risk having the ammino, although low risk, but it wouldn't change our outcome anyway. But that is us! Good luck with your decisions!

    I had my midwife app. Yesterday, all good, baby's head has dropped down I to pelvis and I'm getting heaps of BH contractions, I'm 34 wks now and midwife said I could possibly go early.
    I'm getting really excited, but don't want baby to come just yet, get me to 37 wks at least!
    Getting really uncomfortable now, peeing most of the time, restless nights.
    I finished work last Thursday ....yay! Was so ready to finish, just can't believe that time has arrived!

    How is everyone else?, it's pretty quiet these days on this thread!

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    Twocam  (30-10-2013)

  7. #165
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    Freya, like Precious our testing bought our risk up to over 1/450 so we didn't do any additional testing.

    Precious wow you are on the home stretch now - just seems like yesterday we were all just joining this board!

    AFM I'm 28 weeks and everything is still great. I'm not really any more tired or anything yet. I can still do up my shoes but I do find walking up stairs a bit more 'breath-taking' than before. I am really in denial and still haven't organised the nursery but we did have our baby shower at work last week, so at least we have a few supplies now!

  8. #166
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    I know Twocam, the time has gone by so quickly. I am finishing off the last bits & pieces to baby's room. Bags are packed and ready, getting nervous...it's been 15 yrs since I pushed out a baby! Hope my body doesn't fail me.

    My 18 yr son is still not coming to terms with it, he doesn't talk to me much these days. This makes me so so sad! I cry often about it cos we used to be so close, he stays mostly at his dads place and my mums place when he goes to Uni. It all started about 4 weeks ago when we changed all the rooms around. We have a 3 bedroom house and my son only comes up 2 nights out of a fortnight, so his sister got his old room because she is with me every other week. My son thinks his sister should share a room with the baby, so he stills has a room. This is not a good option, so with lots of talking and months of talking the rooms were changed when he wasn't here...his choice!
    Baby now will now have my daughters old room and there is a bed for him when he ones up. But no he is not happy about these plans and is ****ed off with me and his sister. I have tried so hard to be sensitive to him, but I really think he's not looking at it realistically. So everything else is going well, my daughter is embracing the idea of the baby, she's putting on a baby shower for me next weekend. She is angry with her brother, so it's been really hard emotionally for me these past weeks and I have to try and not let it upset me too much, but it's so hard.

    Anyway, we are meeting up for coffee before my yoga class this afternoon so I hope he is responsive otherwise it's gonna be awkward.

    sorry for my vent!
    How is everyone else going?

  9. #167
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    Hello ladies, just dipping in my toe! Hello Twocam... so good to have a great positive thread to read through.
    I'm 5+4 today - still nervous, but getting more and more excited with each day too.

    Em x

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    Twocam  (08-11-2013)

  11. #168
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    Hello - can I join too?? I feel like I've only been pregnant for 5 minutes but would like to join in. I'll be 5 weeks tmrw and will be going for my first scan just before 8 weeks (can't go earlier as I will be away). I feel like I'm holding my breath until the scan but I should be used to all the waiting and reaching the milestones as IVF conditions you for that.

    We're having our second IVF baby and I will be just shy of 42 when this little one arrives. Our DS is about to turn 3.

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    Twocam  (08-11-2013)

  13. #169
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    Hi Monicker - I think this is a slow thread... probably because everyone is exhausted like I am most of the time! lol.
    I think we're all holding our breath until the first scan and then we'll hold it again until the 12 week scan... it doesn't get much easier after you get your BFP does it.
    It's funny though - I got sent all this stuff from my clinic on early pregnancy and I said to DH, it's kinda like making it to the next level on a computer game - I never knew all this stuff existed when I was just doing cycle after cycle as I've never been pregnant before - it's like a whole new world now.

    Em x

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    Twocam  (08-11-2013)

  15. #170
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    hi all,

    Can I join in too?? I'm 9wk+6 and am in complete SHOCK!! I turned 40 in May and after years of PCOS and not being 'safe' my DH and I are just in shock we fell pregnant. It truly is a miracle... I'm worried about being 40 and pregnant and can only hope everything will be fine..

    Can't wait to get to know you all and hear your stories.

  16. The Following User Says Thank You to Jellybean73 For This Useful Post:

    Twocam  (08-11-2013)


 

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