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  1. #21
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    Well, I spelt it all out for him and he looked like he understood. Until I said it was his actions (not just on Wednesday but in general) that leave me feeling insignificant and unimportant to him. Then suddenly it became all my fault again, I'm being irrational and saying he is pathetic and selfish and that he can't do anything right. Now his phone is also off.

    SIGH...

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    He is emotionally manipulating you into thinking you are overreacting so as to excuse his behaviour. Have a read of this:

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/yashar..._b_958859.html
    I was coming in to say gaslighting. Good article.

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    PinkSmarties  (03-05-2013)

  4. #23
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    Partners can deal with the loss of a baby differently....(they were not the ones carrying the baby and experienced the pregnancy from a somewhat removed position)...however you would hope he would be able to understand (or at he very least try) where you're coming from.....hope everything works out

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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkSmarties View Post
    Well, I spelt it all out for him and he looked like he understood. Until I said it was his actions (not just on Wednesday but in general) that leave me feeling insignificant and unimportant to him. Then suddenly it became all my fault again, I'm being irrational and saying he is pathetic and selfish and that he can't do anything right. Now his phone is also off.

    SIGH...

    Sorry my other response was a bit late! (Started it and then got caught up w work)....an extreme overreaction on his part....hope you're doing ok.

  6. #25
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    What he did was completely wrong. But saying he is pathetic and can't doing anything right is not the way to go about trying to sort through the issue and try to get him to understand. It will send him even more into the defensive.

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  8. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by our3boys View Post
    What he did was completely wrong. But saying he is pathetic and can't doing anything right is not the way to go about trying to sort through the issue and try to get him to understand. It will send him even more into the defensive.
    I read it that his interpretation of what she is saying is that he is pathetic and selfish...not that she actually said that.

    Correct me if I'm wrong op.

    Sent from my GT-I9305 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    Quote Originally Posted by BlotchedTabby View Post
    I read it that his interpretation of what she is saying is that he is pathetic and selfish...not that she actually said that.

    Correct me if I'm wrong op.

    Sent from my GT-I9305 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    You are right.

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    You have every right to feel the way you do. I wouldn't back down to him either, he is in the wrong and acting childish and he needs to see he has done wrong by you and your family together.

    Men grieve in different ways to women but that doesn't explain or warrant leaving you alone, grieving your baby alone and then having a go at you and calling you controlling. How dare he!

    I am sorry about your baby, just know I am grieving with you for your loss.

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