This is a vent post, so I apologise for that!
My in laws (almost all of them except one!) are all about themselves. DH was like this just not as much anymore as he has learned over the years to actually give back rather than take.
My family is close and we all talk to each other on a daily basis. I found it really weird when I met DH that he wasn't close to his family at all, not even a phone call on birthdays etc.
I realize families are different and that is okay, but now we have kids I find it really sad that they don't even call or text to ask how their grandson is going or even how their eldest son is. I used to text them all the time and the reply I get is extremely one sided not asking how we are or anything.
Then MIL complains she has never met DS... They haven't bothered to come and visit or anything. (We live interstate so I realize this is hard financially)
This morning I send them a happy Easter text and this afternoon I get "I went to work" as a reply... I really should know better as the reply always makes me upset at the fact they never ask about their grandson and it makes me sad that DS will probably never get to know his other grandparents. Just lucky I guess my parents are amazing grandparents.
DH has basically given up on them and I have slowly seen over the years why. Arghhhh... Vent over thanks for reading!
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31-03-2013 21:45 #1
31-03-2013 21:48 #2
That sux. And is hurtful.
But you cant change them or teach them how to have good social skills.
Time to just accept thats the way they are and stop trying.
31-03-2013 21:58 #3
Salamat, that is exactly it! No social skills! I was trying to find the accurate description for it and that is it! Thanks.
31-03-2013 22:08 #4
I don't think there are many threads on here about in laws that AREN'T vent threads.
It's really hard when in-laws act in a way you can't even understand. Mine are kinda jerks, and I'm glad I'm not legally related to them in any way and that I haven't mothered any of their grandchildren (yet).
MIL has her favourite grandchild, and it is obvious by how she talks about and treats the others compared to this one child. I don't understand how she can do it so obviously tbh. It's revolting to watch.
If that is what his family is like, it's probably better that you're not living closer.
01-04-2013 07:39 #5
Hee hee FruitBowl glad I could help you finally label whats wrong with them!
01-04-2013 08:29 #6
I would of sent a reply saying. Oh that's no good we had a great day here ds got very spoilt and did xyz.
01-04-2013 08:59 #7-
- Join Date
- Mar 2013
Sounds like its probably a good thing your son will not have their influence in his life. They have your number, they have your address, if they want to speak/see you, nothing is stopping them. To blame you for not seeing their grandson is a cop out. Sadly some people will never learn that the world doesn't revolve around them. I am glad your hubby has not followed their example
02-04-2013 00:17 #8
I seriously think even if we lived across the road they wouldn't even bother! It is sad..
FIL posts political crap on FB all the time yet cannot "like" or comment on a status or photo I or DH have posted. Actually that is a lie, I once tagged him in a beautiful photo of DS & DH and his comment was "Why am I tagged? I am not in this photo?"
Anyway you are right, if DS (or their own son) isn't important in their life then why should I bother and let it affect me?
Sassy your MIL playing favourites openly like that is not fair! Sounds terrible!
02-04-2013 00:18 #9
I should have said something like that!!!!
02-04-2013 08:29 #10Winner 2009 - Member you would most like to meet in Real Life
- Join Date
- Feb 2006
My ex husband family was like that. Never contacted us unless they wanted something. So glad I got to close the door on that lot.
So glad I have much better in laws who I love and adore now and who treat us like family too. They are truly family and I'm lucky to have another mum and dad and sister and brother who help with whatever they can if needed.
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