Just wondering if you have court orders do you abide by them?
Or do you go with an arrangement that suits both of you even though there are court orders in place?
I ask because my ex wants to cut down his days of phone contact that are listed in the court orders. He also wants to change the swap over point, which is stipulated in the orders by address.
He has been forgetting (or just not ringing) phone contact for the last month or so. He just doesn't call when he is meant to.
Swap over and phone contact suit us where they are just fine. The kids get a little upset when he misses his phone calls as they are older and know what day it is and when he calls.
I have been with my DP for 5 years now and my ex has just recently re-partnered to someone who also has two children (from what I can gather from what the girls have said).
Just after what other people do and whether or not I just stick to what the court orders say.
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24-03-2013 09:44 #1
For those with Court Orders?????
24-03-2013 10:01 #2
I suppose it's up to you? My SIL does not abide by hers he exDP is only supposed to have visiting time with her there but the kids have had sleep overs at his house etc ever since she felt comfortable with it.
24-03-2013 10:15 #3Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
I wouldn't let him change it unless you are happy with it. You can also change the orders if both of you agree. However, in reality he has broken the orders already. You could inform the courts and he could get in real trouble.
I hope you two can sort it out and your kids are ok with the agreement you can come up with
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24-03-2013 10:17 #4
Any agreement you and exDP make in writing with both signatures will over-write the court orders so if you are Ok with what he wants to do, you can alter it
I have orders for DD and for about two years we haven't stuck by them, we have just reached an amicable agreement and stick with that.
24-03-2013 15:12 #5
contact your solicitor.
I know in my case it was not a issue about changing change over point. Even when the case was heard again years later after visitation had been going on for years etc..the magistrate was not bothered by the change over point changing.
although if his lack of phone contact is upsetting the children and you can not resolve it with him by discussing the matter.. I would have your solicitor write to his in regards to reminding him of the court order and stating the effect it is having on the children when he does not call at the ordered times etc.
also document everything in regards to the times he fails to phone etc.. it will assist you down the track if your case ever needs to go to court again
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24-03-2013 15:13 #6
24-03-2013 15:33 #7
24-03-2013 15:43 #8
I don't blame you..
far out its so expensive hey
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24-03-2013 16:04 #9Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2010
We choose to stick to court orders 110%
In our case I believe the orders contribute to a meaningful relationship between both bio parents & SD
We do however jump for extra time if bio mum offers it
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28-03-2013 11:36 #10
If there is a written or mutualy agreed change like pick up location or phone call times and you are happy to both abide by, it would be rare for the court to force you to return to the order as it was originally written if this new practice had been in place for some time. You can also apply to have these changes written permanently into the order, but would need to have your solicitor do up the documents to have courts approve the change.
The order is always the fall back however - that if you cant agree otherwise- it stipulates what is expected of each party involved. Minor infringements rarely get brought back before the courts because really who has thousands of dollars to pay a solicitor to slap ppl over the wrist for not calling on a day they were supposed to.
its frustrating! But all you can do is either agree to a change or explain in an email that by him not calling when he has agreed to that your children are emotionally affected and express their dissapointment from not being able to speak with him. If he is aware of the impact it has and continues to not call.. it may lead to more serious discussions in the future should the arrangement come under review again etc.
Last edited by MadeWithLove; 28-03-2013 at 11:40.
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