Hi, I'm new to this section, separated on 3 march. DH has been cheating on me since mid 2010 with at least 4 women that I know of. I have always been primary carer of our two kids with him helping around 4-15 hours over a week. He has a lot of hobbies.
What split ratio of assets do you think I'll be awarded and how much time with our 3&5 year olds?
I'm really nervous about the custody espescially. I want to remain primary carer my kids are my life. Ex DH is saying he will agree to no less than 50/50 care and 50/50 division of assets. I'm scared he'll get it.
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08-03-2013 20:55 #1
Division of assets n parenting agreement
08-03-2013 21:06 #2Winner 2009 - Member you would most like to meet in Real Life
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Best bet call legal aid and get ball rolling for mediation. He can go for shared parental responsibility and unless you can prove it detrimental to the kids he could go for 50/50.
Best to get a parental agreement in place ASAP to make sure the children come back when meant to.
08-03-2013 21:12 #3
Best to seek legal advice for sure. However I know a mum in a similar situation and she was allowed 70/30% of assets due to the situation (with two children in their teens and ex being main financial provider) so I do think your better off getting serious advice.
Hugs hun, cr@p that your having to go through it.
08-03-2013 21:19 #4
I doubt he would get 50/50 asset split.
They would take into account your diminished earning capacity while raising your children and I also believe his infidelity may be a factor also.
08-03-2013 21:47 #5
I don't believe they can take infidelity into account with the property asset division - the family courts of Australia do not acknowledge reason for separation (unlike American courts, which is why you hear the term 'irreconcilable differences' thrown about, because there they do acknowledge the reason).
They will however take into account your future need and your earning potential, which will be diminished if you get majority custody of your child and therefore an additional adjustment to the asset split would occur based on this.
It's important to remember that anything he had before you started living together is rightfully his and only assets acquired during the relationship go towards property division, unless couples make other arrangements independent to the court. So depending on what he had when you started the relationship would be a big factor in the division of property.
Contact your legal aid in your state or a family lawyer and they can guide you on how to start the process. You can make custody arrangements and property division well before the divorce is processed.
08-03-2013 21:50 #6
Also don't forget super. I believe your entitled to a per engage of his super if you have been home raising children(there for your own super has suffered)
08-03-2013 21:51 #7
Yeah, they wont take infidelity into account. The asset split will be determined by the custody. As my partner's ex has majority custody of thier kids she got 70% of the assests. Basically the more you have the children, the more assets/ child support you get. And yeah, they include super as part of the assets.
08-03-2013 22:01 #8
I was in a similar position to you when my ex and I broke up.
I was told I could get more than 50/50 split of assets. I stupidly agreed to 50/50 to keep the peace and also agreed to leave his super alone Don't make this mistake because it only kept the peace for about 3 years and now recently we have been through family court again.
Go for what the lawyers tell you you could get. In fact go for more so that you can come down to what you would be content with eg 70/30 or whatever you aim for.
ETA as for 50/50 care he may find that harder than he thinks as who will look after the children when he is at work etc. I would ask a lawyer what they think is reasonable for children of their ages and mediate to that. Or every second weekend or something. Oh and don't forget arrangements for school otherwise it comes up again later and back again to mediation
Last edited by PomPoms; 08-03-2013 at 22:03.
08-03-2013 22:06 #9
I think some of the incorrect things being said in this thread show why it is a good idea to get real legal advice ASAP.
08-03-2013 22:37 #10
i'd def seek legal aid asap to get it all rolling. if you do go for a private lawyer they can be quite pricey.
i had a friend in a very similar situation and he got 50/50 custody as she couldn't prove it wasn't in the best interest of the children not to. BUT you can't really judge your situation on others and everyone is different.
You basically need a really good lawyer in this situation so i'd get onto that asap.
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