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  1. #1
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    Default Advice about a friend dealing with grief

    A very good friend of mine is going through a hard time at the moment. Her father is very ill and they believe he will pass in the next week or so. He has been sick for a while, however he has gone downhill in the last week. She is off wok and currently staying with her parents.

    I'm just after some advice from someone who may have gone through something similar to find out what was helpful/unhelpful during this time.

    I've been messaging every day to see how she is going (she finds it too hard to talk on the phone at the moment) but I'm not sure if its enough. She doesn't have kids, so no need to offer babysitting, etc.

  2. #2
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    Default Advice about a friend dealing with grief

    I haven't been in this situation OP, but I have a couple of ideas...

    Could you bring around some home cooked meals for her and the family? Could you offer to get their groceries or run errands? Could you do their washing and/or cleaning? Do they have a dog that you could walk for them?

    Just thinking of things I wouldn't be able to do, or want to do, if I had a very ill family member.

    I'm sure there are lots of hubbers that can give you better ideas than mine. I think keeping in contact with your friend is lovely - I'm sure she appreciates it.

    You sound like a very caring friend.

  3. #3
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    Default Advice about a friend dealing with grief

    Bumping for the morning crowd

  4. #4
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    Default Advice about a friend dealing with grief

    I have been in this situation and found my best friend just did things without offering. House was a mess she came and cleaned up. No food in the house she bought food ( and left the receipt as she knew I wouldn't want her to pay for everything). I am the kind of person who thinks she can do everything and often refuse help. That's why my bestie never asked.
    I think this would only work if you have a close relationship to your friend.

  5. #5
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    Just her knowing you are there is good maybe help with meals cleaning and just drop by and chatting for a bit is good too.

  6. #6
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    Thanks for the replies everyone, there are some great suggestions. I'll keep up the daily contact and will pop around this afternoon to see her.

  7. #7
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    Default Advice about a friend dealing with grief

    I went thru the same in 2011 & I was a mess, DP was working away at the time and only home on weekends so during the week I would get drunk every night because it eased the pain & help me forget things. My friend at the time come around and looked after my DS and helped me aswell just being there. If you can just be there for her if she needs a hug talk or just needs company. It's not nice going thru it and it's even worse when it's someone close and family.


 

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