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  1. #1
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    Default 23 month old can't self settle

    My 23 month old DD will not go to sleep on her own and still needs to be held, patted and sung to. The history is that she has been sick for a lot of her life and as such struggled to sleep for a long time due to pain overnight. The medical problems have been sorted and she can sleep well when she actually gets to sleep but won't go to sleep without all of the above. During the day I either pat and sing to her on my lap until she goes to sleep or drive her around until she sleeps and transfer her into the cot when she is asleep. As such she never goes in the cot awake.
    How can I change this pattern so she can send herself to sleep - in particular if she wakes overnight so she can go back to sleep? If she wakes at the moment she needs to be patted back to sleep. I want to be able to transition her to a toddler bed at some stage but I can't do that if she can't actually go to sleep in there.

    Please help!! TIA

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    You could just skip the toddler bed and go to a normal bed. This way you could lie with her to get her used to falling asleep in bed.

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    Default 23 month old can't self settle

    Bump for the morning crowd

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    Default 23 month old can't self settle

    Thank you. It is very difficult to know what to do. It's reassuring to hear that we doing the right thing. We have tried putting her in the cot awake and still patting and singing. I guess just taking away one thing at a time. Being a parent is hard - you never seem to know what the right thing to do is! Thanks for your help

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    Default 23 month old can't self settle

    I still sit with my 29mth old to put her to bed. It takes 10-15min of reading books and softly patting her bum.

    Some kids TT early, others walk early and some kids sleep by themselves easily. But I believe it's developmental. They will do it when they are ready.

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    Default 23 month old can't self settle

    Cookingmonster- my dd is 22 months and she had shocking reflux for about 9 months, and she would not sleep for more than 20min intervals day and night. Some 24hr periods she was doing a total of 7hrs sleep! As a result, she still wakes constantly through the night even though she no longer suffers reflux. I think it's just such a habit and it has so far been impossible to break. She does go to sleep without settling when we first put her down, but then everytime she wakes we need to go in there to settle her. This is still about 8 times per night! Unfortunately I have no advice as I'm desperate to get this fixed too, but just wanted to say I feel for you. It's certainly tough hey.

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    Default 23 month old can't self settle

    Quote Originally Posted by Brulee View Post
    Cookingmonster- my dd is 22 months and she had shocking reflux for about 9 months, and she would not sleep for more than 20min intervals day and night. Some 24hr periods she was doing a total of 7hrs sleep! As a result, she still wakes constantly through the night even though she no longer suffers reflux. I think it's just such a habit and it has so far been impossible to break. She does go to sleep without settling when we first put her down, but then everytime she wakes we need to go in there to settle her. This is still about 8 times per night! Unfortunately I have no advice as I'm desperate to get this fixed too, but just wanted to say I feel for you. It's certainly tough hey.
    Oh I feel for you. That sounds very challenging I hope it gets easier for you soon. I agree that a lot of it is habit - I know we have created habits with our dd that I am now trying to break. It's hard because they get used to things one way and now we have decided that we want to change it. I hope we both have some relief soon. I keep thinking that I won't need to sing her to sleep when she's 16... Hopefully!


 

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