He has never been left to cry in his cot ever. We co-slept a fair bit in the first few months but not really anymore. I babywear and have more than one type of carrier for different occasions. And as I said, I respond to his needs (as I believe most parents do!).
However I don't BF (couldn't), happily put him in his own room and cot at 4 months. Happily leave him for a few hours to be babysat so I can go out. I don't like baby wearing all the time (and honestly roll my eyes when the same people on the forum suggest that as the solution to everything!). And I'm returning to work part-time when he is 9 months old.
I don't believe that responding to his needs means he needs to be with me or on me 24/7. He is like me - he likes his own space sometimes!
I read on another thread a while back that even if you do all the "things" that an AP does, you're not really AP unless you do those things for certain AP-type reasons. I thought that was interesting and don't disagree. But I think the "why" is still a bit confusing.
So I guess my point is... All parents respond to their babies needs. So what is different about AP?
I think it is a bit black and white to say that an AP is someone who responds to their baby, implying that those who are not AP (and have no desire to be) are not responsive. And I don't think it's a big leap to come to that conclusion. If the differentiation between AP and everyone else is responding to your baby, that means that those are not AP are not responsive.
Despite my massive post, it doesn't actually bother me. I genuinely think its an interesting discussion though
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28-01-2013 11:36 #21
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28-01-2013 11:40 #22
28-01-2013 11:47 #23
I'm trying to be a good mum.
28-01-2013 11:55 #24
28-01-2013 11:55 #25
Question, what makes you not an attachment parent?
IMO it's ignoring your babies needs be that social/emotional/physical ie using CIO or CC.
Lots of people think you have to do these things to be an AP parent
cloth nappies/elimination communication
IMO these things do not define an attachment parent, you can do these things and AP but you can do these things and not AP as well.
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28-01-2013 11:56 #26
28-01-2013 11:58 #27
Looks like I'm an AP too then!
But I still don't think I really am. Or maybe its just that a label doesn't work for such a wide spectrum as parenting.
ETA: if this is the case then surely AP has become the norm/main******? I think people who do CIO are in the vast minority (appreciate that could just be in my personal experience though).
28-01-2013 12:05 #28
Just because you don't see yourself as AP doesn't mean your not responsive, I'm not saying that at all. You don't like labels that's cool we don't need to use them but saying I am saying your not responsive because you don't call yourself AP is a bit mixed up.
I hope that makes sense!
28-01-2013 12:06 #29
28-01-2013 12:10 #30
By OS&N in forum General ChatReplies: 11Last Post: 19-07-2013, 19:40
By elleandsam in forum Natural / Attachment ParentingReplies: 9Last Post: 21-02-2012, 14:21
By SpecialPatrolGroup in forum General ChatReplies: 2Last Post: 31-01-2012, 14:56
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