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  1. #11
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    London is offline “I think we're losing our sense of humor instead of being able to relax and laugh at ourselves" - Betty White
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    I had one when I was pregnant 8yrs ago...my mum organised it for me and I thought it was a fun thing to do. Had about 10 girls there and I think the most expensive gift would have been probably $40ish. Hardly a gift grab. I did it because it was kind of the done thing to do and I thought it sounded like fun.

    This time around Im not having one but only because nobody is throwing me one and I cant afford to throw one myself. I would love to invite a bunch of people over to celebrate what will be:
    - our first child together
    - my last pregnancy
    - DPs only child

    The above reasons are why I would want one....not for gifts and not to have attention.

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    Default Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    Hate them. It's a gift grab. I never had one for any of my 3 babies. I also never had the kitchen tea etc associated with weddings. I celebrate our kids first b'day and christening on the same day. I'd rather just catch up with friends without the gifts. I love parties and socialising but hate the present thing. Just come see me - no expectations.

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bennos Mummy View Post

    I like the celebration/catch up/games/food aspect of them. I am more than happy to buy a gift for the mum to be or baby. I would buy one even if they didnt have a baby shower.

    i'll still have one for my second. Even if i specify 'no gifts' i will still want to have a party.

    I dont know. Sometimes if you think too much about things it takes the fun out of it
    100% agree, I had one for DD that was just nibblies at a cafe overlooking the SC hinterland

    It's a reason to get together and celebrate the pending arrival of a baby.
    Last edited by MrJones&Me; 16-01-2013 at 12:28.

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    I loathe those things too. As I do all those other crappy Tupperware or linen party things. Ick, get me outa there!

    I just generally hate these societal gatherings of women (where men are generally excluded) or man gatherings (where women are excluded).

    I've been invited to so many baby showers by people I'm not even really friends with. They just wanted an extra present, go away!

    Haha such a joy I am! Don't get me wrong i love a good party, get together, glass (or 3) of wine with my pals, just not those types of rituals.

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    Default Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    I think its really unfair to assume its a gift grab! Mine wasn't a gift grab, I spent months asking people to stop/not buy me things! But my mum, ILs, and my friends really wanted to organise one for me (first grandchild and a difficult TTC journey so plenty to celebrate!) and I wasn't going to get all negative about it and refuse. They got just as much out of it as I did! Everyone got to eat heaps of nice food and drink nice champers so I hardly took a gift at the door and asked where their food platter was!

    Obviously some people get wrapped up in it like a PP's friend but it's not always the case.

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    Default Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    Also, if you don't want gifts (or if you don't want to give a gift at a shower), ask for or make a donation to charity instead. For DD's 1st birthday party we set up an Everyday Hero page where people could make a donation to our chosen children's charity.

    If I have a shower or similar for #2, I'll probably do this again, maybe for a charity that supports new mothers or something like that.

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    Default Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    Quote Originally Posted by Cue View Post
    I think its really unfair to assume its a gift grab! Mine wasn't a gift grab, I spent months asking people to stop/not buy me things! But my mum, ILs, and my friends really wanted to organise one for me (first grandchild and a difficult TTC journey so plenty to celebrate!) and I wasn't going to get all negative about it and refuse. They got just as much out of it as I did! Everyone got to eat heaps of nice food and drink nice champers so I hardly took a gift at the door and asked where their food platter was!

    Obviously some people get wrapped up in it like a PP's friend but it's not always the case.
    I totally agree.

    I've been to lots of baby showers in the last year and not one was a coven of women centred around a bratty mother to be who expects lots of gifts.

    Every shower I have been to has been a lovely afternoon celebrating a new baby. Even in the midst of ttc and lots of miscarriages I'm happy to buy a present for my good friends baby. It doesn't have to be a county road outfit either.

    There seems to be lots of bad vibes on the BH about baby showers, like If you have one you are only doing it for the presents.

    Our baby took 2.5 years to make and I also have a lot of really good female friends, there is no way I could stop them and my mum from throwing one to celebrate this baby. Its not about the presents, I couldn't care less if we don't get any.

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    Never had one, never been to one. I'm with MTB, I hate those ritual parties. I don't go to hens parties or kitchen tea things either. I bring a new baby a gift the first time I meet them. I also don't give wedding and engagement presents.

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    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    I never had a baby shower with my first and won't for my second. I, personally, have found that every baby shower I have been to there are a lot of people there that don't really have much to do with the Mum-to-be (especially noticed this at a bff's shower) and it seemed like they were inviting lots of people to get presents.

    I would much rather go to lunch before edd and the emphasis be catching up before things get hectic, then giving the new Mum a gift for bub when they arrive.

    For those of you that think baby showers are okay for your first, but not subsequent babies, why is that? Are the other impending births not as important? Is it only socially acceptable to expect (yes, expect because otherwise why have a baby shower) presents once?
    For me, I had a baby shower and invited all those who supported me and understood when I was going through ivf. To me it was a day to be spoilt and pampered and catch up with friends in which I deserved, me being pregnant was no doubt a reason to celebrate. Its also good to catch up before baby arrives. i didn't have a baby shower with my second but not because I didn't want to or not think it relevant but because I was away from my closest friends this time so getting together was difficult.

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    Default Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    I love the concept of a baby shower. To me it's not about gifts but a time to catch up with everyone before the baby is born and the craziness begins with a newborn. How hard is it to spend some time with your friends, having some nibbles and maybe a glass of champagne, having a bit of fun. I am hosting a baby shower in a few weeks and 14 of my friends closest friends have been invited for a few games out in the sunshine. Can't wait I couldn't care less what presents people bring and I'm sure my friend doesn't either.


 

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