Seriously say something to her. Maybe she does want to talk about it but doesn't realise it.
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24-12-2012 09:38 #11
24-12-2012 10:12 #12Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2009
I would be hurt too.
But, things can sometimes be repeated out of context - particularly by children, who can't understand the complexity of feelings involved. She may have just been venting, and your niece interpreted that as 'hate' (which seems like a more child thing to say than adult).
She may be jealous, and was just sounding off - which we all do sometimes, no matter how much we love someone - and your niece may have over heard.
I'm not trying to make excuses - just that sometimes these things can come across worse when you don't have the full story.
Could you talk to your mum or dad about it? In that instance I'd be inclined to ask my mum, as I know my sister would have probably said stuff to her too. I know you said you don't like confrontation, but if it's going to eat away at you then maybe it would be better to say something?
24-12-2012 10:36 #13
Re: Sister troubles/vent
Thank you all for your advice. I may just try to shrug it of eventually maybe was talen out of context maybe k heard her rant but yeah just dont like this feeling.
I asked mum if its true and she said probly. Atm my mum is annoyed with her as mum and dad have her and her 2 daughters living with her. Long story short my 2 sisters are swapping houses. 1 my parents own and 1 my other sister owns. My sister had to clean out her house so they could renovate it for my other sister and her family to move in. my sister staying with my mum and dad. She was surpose to stay 1 month but will be staying about 3-4 months due to labourers on holiday and what not. She dont help my mum in anyway except make more mess. Of course my mum loves having the girls there but its like she has 3 kids under the age of 10 not a 7 yr, 10 yr and a 30 yr old.
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24-12-2012 10:40 #14Senior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
24-12-2012 19:15 #15
Do you see her often? Will you be seeing her often in future? Do you want a close relationship with her (or rather, can you see that being an actual possibility)?
If no, then honestly, I'd just have a b*tch about it here, to my partner, to a friend... or whatever... and leave it be. No need to confront someone if you don't want or expect that it'll make a difference to your relationship.
I have issues with my brother and father, but I don't see them enough to worry about confrontations or discussing things. What's the point? We'll never be close. Me saying something is unlikely to change this, except perhaps make it worse. So I just suck it up, whinge about them to my friends, BH and my partner, but mostly just ignore it when I'm around them... because it's not like I see them often, it's not like we'll ever be great friends... it's just not worth my time and effort.
Little kids also catch snippets of things... and she might have caught that info after something happened, or someone said or did somethnig that triggered it. I say people are idiots all the time... I call my mother an idiot sometimes, for stupid things she does that annoy me, but I LOVE her to bits... I'd hate it if DD overheard me whinging to DP about something (and it's usually stuff like my mother being technology-illiterate or how she had burnt herself to a crisp to be "brown," or putting up with crap from her bf, etc... stuff that bothers me but no way means I HATE her)... and go tell my mother and have my Mum think I actually do hate her and think she's an idiot (in a hate way).
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