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    Default 3 and a half year old twins out of control...

    Does anyone know of a help line I can call about children's behaviour? The girls are just completely out of control and it's taking a toll on me mentally and on mine and DF's relationship. It started before DD3 was born but has gotten worse. The back chatting and destroying things around the house are the two major issues, they don't listen to us at all.
    If we send them to bed they will literally poo and wee all over the floor and rub it into the carpet and walls despite being fully TT.

    Yesterday alone they somehow got out of their room whilst having a nap and I'd fallen asleep with a bowl of porridge, they rubbed it all through their room. I lost it and sent them to Mum's for the day. Picked them up and they refused dinner and then got toilet paper and paper towel and shredded them through their room. This morning I get up and they've gotten out of their room, climbed the shelves and somehow opened a bottle of Infants Friend and poured it all over themselves and the bed. So not only is it naughty, it's dangerous. We keep locks on most things around the house but sometimes forget to re-lock them before going to bed.

    They're getting plenty of attention and we try to take them out and about but usually ends in disaster.

    We've tried 123 Magic and time outs, separation, taking possessions, rewards for good behaviour and last resorts yelling and smacks. Nothing works and I'm in tears over it.

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    Default 3 and a half year old twins out of control...

    Have you looked into what they're eating?? It could be something as simple as an additive or colour ...

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    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    Default Re: 3 and a half year old twins out of control...

    What state are you in OP?

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    Default 3 and a half year old twins out of control...

    What is their sleeping like? That's the first question I ask if my children are more challenging than usual!

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    I don't have much to add but I couldn't not reply! I get eansy when DD gets food on herself... I don't like messes I couldn't imagine cleaning up what you've described!!!
    I think looking at what they are eating is a good start, I suppose another is your reaction, are you constant with punishments? do they fit the bill? My mum was strict and I knew better than to do something I wasnt supposed to as an adult Im not sure WHAT I was scared about... but I was.
    She threatened more than once to leave as in leave me at home alone I had separation anxiety because dad traveled for work so I would loooosssee it!
    Also being twins they probably gang up and egg each other on, my aunt has twins that's how they were...

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    I couldn't read and not reply OP. I think you should speak perhaps to a paed and MCHN about anything that might be available in your local area - in our area there are people which can come out and help parents and families.

    Also speak to your family about how bad it has gotten for you and your DF, I think you also need to communicate about everything and get a plan together to tackle it as a team. Look into everything PP's have said regarding food, sleep etc...

    Also make sure you are getting time out like you did yesterday, call in others for help.

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    I have no experience with twins just the age.

    Could you seperate them when they are been in time out? Do they egg each other on when they are together?

    I actually would try going in a completely new direction. Over the top postive reinforcement. Really praise each thing they do well and keep a chart and have little rewards. Ignore bad behaviour as much as possible and keep them busy. I know this is really hard to do when you have a newborn but it may shock them.

    Is it possible to draw up a bit of a visual timetable of what they are doing each day so they know what they are doing so they know what to exepect? Do you think they are bored or not expending enough energy? I would try for a park trip and run them ragged or a basic obstacle course in the backyard, art activity, singalongs or as much as you have the energy for. Can they be given chores that they get a little pocket money?

    I think they sound like super smart little girls that can feed off each other whilst their poor mother is run ragged and it's funny to see Mummy's face turn purple each day. I would just try to keep them busy and see if their is a change. Like super tiring busy that makes them start snoring by 6.30pm at night Do they still have a daysleep? Maybe they are ready to cut it out?

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to Aquillah For This Useful Post:

    babyla  (17-12-2012)

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    threechooks is offline If my spelling annoys you that's your problem.... I have better things to do than proofread !
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    Do they have care outside the home? Are they like this for carers as well or just you and your DH? Do they start kindy next year?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Aquillah View Post
    I have no experience with twins just the age.

    Could you seperate them when they are been in time out? Do they egg each other on when they are together?

    I actually would try going in a completely new direction. Over the top postive reinforcement. Really praise each thing they do well and keep a chart and have little rewards. Ignore bad behaviour as much as possible and keep them busy. I know this is really hard to do when you have a newborn but it may shock them.

    Is it possible to draw up a bit of a visual timetable of what they are doing each day so they know what they are doing so they know what to exepect? Do you think they are bored or not expending enough energy? I would try for a park trip and run them ragged or a basic obstacle course in the backyard, art activity, singalongs or as much as you have the energy for. Can they be given chores that they get a little pocket money?

    I think they sound like super smart little girls that can feed off each other whilst their poor mother is run ragged and it's funny to see Mummy's face turn purple each day. I would just try to keep them busy and see if their is a change. Like super tiring busy that makes them start snoring by 6.30pm at night Do they still have a daysleep? Maybe they are ready to cut it out?
    This is great advice!!!

    I second a visual praise chart and perhaps a visual timetable so they know what is coming during the day. I have examples I can send you if you like OP, PM me if you need to.

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    Thanks Babyla

    I also have art activites that can be Pm'd OP.


 

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