My husband and I both have children from previous relationships and we both were always adamant we would have kids together, however he is now adamant he never wants to go through the baby stage ever again. This is so frustrating for me as we planned to have 2 children and I said, as he is a bit older than me, that I would really want more kids. He was fine with this but is now getting quite angry whenever I bring it up, saying he just can't handle any more children. The problem is, I am adamant I want more kids...I'm way too young to not have more kids lol.
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02-12-2012 17:06 #1Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2012
Husband kept putting off having children, now he doesn't want any.
02-12-2012 17:24 #2Senior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2011
I havent really got any advice except you need to work out what is most important to you. My DH has 3 children (between 16 & 20), i have none. I was upfront pretty much from day one (the youngest was 13 when we met) as i had no interest in pursuing a relationship with someone who wasnt interested in more children. We have been doing IVF (due to him having a vasectomy with first wife). If he came to me tomorrow and said he has decided he doesnt want any more children then our marriage would be over simply because I have always wanted children and we got together and got married with a mutual understanding that we would try to have children of our own. If IVF doesnt work and we are UNABLE to have children then that would be different (though devastating and i don't know how i would cope). Good luck, i hope you both can come to a solution you are both happy with.
02-12-2012 17:36 #3
I have a distant family member whos marriage broke up because of a situation like this. She was unable to have children and chose not to go through IVF or anything else, her husband desperately wanted children and therefore they mutually agreed that the relationship had reached an end.
I think you need to talk to your husband about the fact there was an agreement, and discuss how it makes you feel now that he is saying no. Are you willing to just stick with the children you have? Or will doing that just cause resentment in the long run? Has he said any other reasons for not wanting anymore children now? Maybe theres another issue there hes not discussing? Either way, its something you definitely need to talk about in a calm matter. Would he still be this way if you accidentally got pregnant? Big hugs! I hope that you can work something out with him.
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