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  1. #101
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by chances View Post
    Lol at "older mother at 30"! Pretty sure the ave first time mother is 31 in Australia. Prfftt I'm 31 and think I'm still young but also old enough and mature enough to raise and support a child. However some people my age are still partying hard - ea to their own.
    I wanted to add that my fear is also that I'll have a massive gap between my first and my second. I'm 26... but have a 7-year-old. I've been a boring old person since I was 19 as a result... I've not been able to live young and party... lol. The longer I leave it between, the more worried I become as not only am I looking at being older, and thus potentially increasing fertility issues, I'll also be looking at almost having raised one kid to adulthood and then starting over right again. I know some women are born to do nothing but have babies... but I want more for me, and I fear that the longer I leave it, the less time I'll have for ME as an adult who can do what I want without having to worry about little children... so 30 is scary, because that means my child will be 11... 7 years away from adulthood... and then having another baby and thus meaning I can't go and travel (I am NOT travelling with a small child... not if I actually want to enjoy my holiday... lol) and do all the things I want...

    So it's not just that 30 is old... but to me, it's old... because it increases the gap between DD and another, thus making ME older when I finally become a free agent again... iywkim.

  2. #102
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Leaving it too late

    I guess me being an old mum doesn't have to worry about the me time as I've had plenty of that and a far bit of life experiences, enough partying. a fair amount of travel to be content with my life, so that just leaves having healthy babies!! Which I have already found out with a molar and an ectopic and doing two ends of ivf isn't easy.
    Good luck to adding to your family, I'm sure you will have a wonderful lil helper

  3. #103
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    If they are close friends and you are talking about it (ie not you throwing a whole lot of advice at them unsolicited!) then I think you should share your concerns. I dunno, I wouldn't with acquaintance-friends but I think my close friendships are strong enough to be able to be honest with each other.

    I completely get that a lot of women haven't met the right man yet, theres nothing anyone can do about that, no point telling a single women she needs to get cracking! But I don't think thats what you are talking about, more the ones who have the house, the marriage, the career, and are just waiting for the *right* time?

    I always wanted kids 'one day', but had a million things I wanted to do and places I wanted to go beforehand. As it turned out, I fell pregnant unexpectedly at 22. I didn't get to work overseas or finish uni etc (I have since having kids though), and my relationship has had more than its fair share of ups and downs as we weren't really in an established relationship, and he was only 18 etc. But neither of us would change it and I am so glad it happened when it did. Even though I wasn't *ready* at conception- I was when DD1 was born. And it meant I could have a 4 yr gap between no. 2 and 3. I know I'll travel and all that stuff one day


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