Scared of the dark

[OurLittleBlessing]

I'm one who is going to go against using some sort of defence system against monsters. Doing so just tells her that there ARE monsters and surely that's more frightening the end?

I'd just tell her there's nothing to worry about and give her a clock radio or a night light or something so it's not pitch black. I'd also be explaining how monsters are most certainly not real.

I agree with this. My 4 year old is going through a phase of this and it helps her if we talk about 3 nice things that happened during the day as she goes to bed. She can then think about those things instead and it seems to work pretty well.

ETA: sorry just realised this is the 2 year old section, so not sure if what we do will work so well, it might depend on the maturity of the child a bit.

[Kelly8329]

^^^ agree don't encourage the thought of monsters.
My 2 year old started going on about being scared and explained that he had scary monsters when he closed his eyes (dreams)
My husband went on to almost encourage the idea of monsters and started looking and saying he will take them away!
I stopped him right away, if my 2 year old can communicate as well as he does then he can understand when I tell him there are no such thing and that if he closes his eyes and has a bad dream just to call out for me.
I then stopped all tv an hour before bed. After a few weeks the idea of monsters was gone and he just likes a light on.

[ARCTICJULZ]

Unfortunately, my (then) 8 year old had to be told that 'monsters' of the human variety, do exist after her friend was snatched from her bed one night and murdered. Since then, and shes now 11, she won't sleep with the window open, our with the bedroom door closed. No matter what security we have, it doesn't offer the comfort that used to be found in having a brave teddy who wouldscare away the imaginary monsters. Shes been through counceling, and is doing karate to learn self defence/reinforce self confidence, but she will never be the same. And I'm sure that everyone impacted by that particular incident will never be the same again either.

[OurLittleBlessing]

I don't know what to say Julz, that is HORRID.

Tragic to say the least.

[ARCTICJULZ]

Sorry, I didn't mean to bring the tone of the conversation down. and I agree that reinforcing monsters to two year olds is rediculous. But, at some point, as parents, we have to validate that there are dangerous things in the world. A brave teddy, or a protective spray bottle that gives a child confidence in the dark can help ease into a later transition of, look there are no werewolves or vampires, but you still need to be careful.
Unfortunately, in my case, I never had the chance to ease into that transition. Reality hit too hard too fast for a lot of people at that point, not just me and mine. Don't really know what I'm trying to say here, but hiding the fact that monsters exist in one form or another just doesn't sit well with me anymore.

[Kelly8329]

Sorry, I didn't mean to bring the tone of the conversation down. and I agree that reinforcing monsters to two year olds is rediculous. But, at some point, as parents, we have to validate that there are dangerous things in the world. A brave teddy, or a protective spray bottle that gives a child confidence in the dark can help ease into a later transition of, look there are no werewolves or vampires, but you still need to be careful.
Unfortunately, in my case, I never had the chance to ease into that transition. Reality hit too hard too fast for a lot of people at that point, not just me and mine. Don't really know what I'm trying to say here, but hiding the fact that monsters exist in one form or another just doesn't sit well with me anymore.

Oh that is so sad and what an awful experience.
We definitely enforce the 'bad people' talk every few months.

[OurLittleBlessing]

Yeah, I get what you're saying. It would be foolish to pretend that there aren't bad people out there.

I think for most kids though, the kind of monsters they are worrying about at bedtime are usually the fictitious kind.

I'm so sorry that your DDs innocence was taken away prematurely.

[NZtoWA]

Hi OP my DS is 31 months and has recently started along the same lines. He'll occasionally say he's scared of the dark because of monsters, lions etc.

It's normally just before bedtime so I'll flick on a small light and we'll have "imagination time". We talk about lions and roar, and bears and other animals and make the noises. If he mentions monsters I tell him monsters aren't real. And throughout I reassure him I'm there, I'm close and I'll protect him, he doesn't need to be afraid, lions live far away in other countries and they can't catch planes etc. It's probably just the silliness of making the noises and talking about animals catching planes but it seems to divert his attention and he enjoys it.

[mumkc]

Julz I know this is an old thread but I came looking for advice for my 3yo DD and read your response. I am so sorry to hear of such a tragic thing happening in your, your DD's and many other's lives. Just awful.