I think sometimes it's easy to forget that other people have issues too and sometimes behave strangely.
Has it been long? Has this happened before? Do you think there's a chance that in a few days or weeks she will 'get over' whatever it is?
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13-11-2012 21:24 #11
13-11-2012 21:26 #12Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
13-11-2012 21:32 #13
13-11-2012 21:50 #14
Maybe they have their own crappy issues
Can be hard to maintain friendships with people like that (or being a person like that).
I recently feel let down by people in my life too
People who meant a lot to me, all of a sudden I realise I'm nothing to them. Just one of many acquaintances to them.
A random person to fill time only when no other better option is available. Ha ha.
13-11-2012 22:02 #15Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2008
I've been depressed... but not lately. It was really bad when I was 21/22 years old... and I wonder if it goes with the territory a bit if you are that way inclined... because you're leaving teens behind and entering a new stage in life and there's lots of feelings and thinking to do.
At least, that is how it was for me.
Anyway... it's been mentioned what is the point of playgroup if you don't speak to anyone and just play with your child.
This reminds me of how I used to find the staff room. I got a job at long last (age 22) and I couldn't handle the staff room. I felt disconnected to everyone and didn't know how to respond to people talking to me. I wasn't interested in what they were saying.
I told this to an older, wiser person whom I'll never forget and they gave me this tip: Even if I wasnt intersted in what a person was saying, I could still show an interest in the actual person. So I started to listen to people. I was also advised to smile. I tried that too. I actually used to give myself a pep-talk prior to lunchbreak and prepare myself to smile and show an interst in the individuals in the staff room.
It really made an enormous change in my life! You'd never think something so simple and so cheesey-sounding could be so powerful. I went from straining to show an interest in people to actually genuinely caring for them and they also began to care for me.
It built confidence in me and a sense of self-worth and I got rid of a person in my life that wasn't good for me (a partner). I moved house and then country! I came back transformed by my experiences and life just got better and better.
I'm so afraid of sounding condescending in my post... I'm so sorry if I do. But I feel so sad when I read people's personal pain because I've been there too... and it isn't a place I ever want to return. I want to wrap everyone up and tell them of the potential they have ; and of the gifts they have; and how much love there is that one can have for oneself.
And I don't say it to be cheesey and annoying. I say it because I believe it. I've experienced the life-changing nature of loving your own self. It's easier to love your own self when you see that others love you. But you have to give others the chance to love you by letting them get to know you.
Playgroup is a wonderful thing. Let your experience there be firstly for your child. Children love it so you tell yourself you are there for the child. Then before you know it your child is involved with another one, and their parent talks to you. Over time people get to know you and it feels good to walk in and someone happily greets you.
Depression had me held down and sucked under to the point of drowning once... it was tiny little steps like being in the community and smiling (even if false to begin with) and showing an interst in other humans that got me out of it... and it's been 13 years now. I want to reach back into those murky waters and yank others out too...
But I don't know anyone's circumstances and we are all different. I realize what worked for me isn't necessarily going to be the way out for everyone.
I hope some good feelings come your way soon. If you don't know what your gifts are yet, you will discover them in time and you can have faith in yourself that you have an important place here. No one is born empty. No one is a waste.
The Following User Says Thank You to onedayatatime For This Useful Post:
13-11-2012 22:55 #16
That is a wonderful post, onedayatatime. Thankyou xx
14-11-2012 06:31 #17
Re: One word
I've had a great nights sleep, nice clear head today and feeling pretty good :-)
Life; it's what happens when you're making other plans
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