DD is 31mths, and not yet TT. At playgroup there are many kids around the same age as her (at least 12 off the top of my head), and none of them are yet TT. I wouldn't stress about that. I've had a couple of brief attempts with DD, but she doesn't seem at all interested and, like you, I'd rather wait until she really WANTS to do it than make life hard on all of us!
She never had a dummy, so I don't know much about that.
Bottles - I'm not sure. I swapped her to a sippy cup when she was 12mths old, as I read that it was not good for their teeth to continue with bottles much after that point. If you were concerned about that then it may be worth looking into it a bit more, as I'm tempted to say that might be one I would push (if bottles do have a detrimental effect on the teeth) but perhaps check first.
I wonder if it may be the same with dummies (but more with development of the jaw and teeth, rather than saliva pooling - which I think is the issue with bottles). But I'm not sure...
For DD I will push her with some things, and not worry with others. I'll always push her a little, to help her learn new things and continue to grow, but I'm also happy to back off if I give a little push and she's not ready/ not interested.
I'd also say there's no point in comparing. People always love to tell you what their kids are doing, but for most of these minor milestones they're all the same once they're at school anyway!
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