*Note- I have chosen to have my diary like other sections of BH, mainly for me to post in and others to read along with at will. I would absolutely love for you to post your questions and other posts in a new thread. This is mostly to keep things as organised as possible for me... I need this organisation to survive
Well, here I am. Sitting on my tiny bottom (I'm not joking, I have no bum!) with my laptop resting on my stomach (so *that's* where my fat goes.. I should send my body a memo that it's doing it all wrong- doesn't it know that women like to have a big booty and an itty bitty waist?)
The odds seem to be stacked against me at the moment. Trying to turn your life around is not a decision to be taken lightly, and for me, I know when I've tried to do it in the past, I've needed other areas of my life to be in relative order. Last week I would have cried from the rooftops that I am ready to take on the world. The world can change in a few days. I am struggling to find care for my boys, and have been on a roller-coaster of people accepting this job and then taking back their offer. It's mentally exhausting to know that no one wants to spend time with your children, and it's really hard to accept because they are the two sweetest little souls you will ever meet.
Anyway- ahem. I digress. My point is that I'm annoyed this is happening because I NEED the clear head and focus to succeed, so the sooner I can find a solution for that problem, the better I will be.
My Zumba DVD's arrived on Monday! I was oh so excited to see my lovely delivery lady at the door, and my boys were excited because they thought someone had sent me a birthday present (them having just had their 4th birthday a few days before.) so they couldn't wait for me to open it up and see what was inside.
B has immediately taken a liking to the toning sticks, and he was proudly showing them off to DP when he got home from work last night lol.
I cleared all the new toys and games off the lounge room floor and put on the first DVD, which is like a 'walk-through' of the steps. (Pfft- walkthrough! You should have seen me huffing and puffing at the walkthrough!)
Of course the boys tried to make life hard and were standing in front of me, beside me and behind me... of course I might have samba'd onto a little foot once or twice- oops!
After about 45 minutes of that though L started sending through the complaints- 'I no want to watch this any more!'.. apparently a jiggly belly is no rival for Lightning McQueen. Who would have thought?
This morning I got up at 5am and put on my Zumba and did a 45 min 'workout'. Thankfully no one was filming me.. although maybe they should have been, I would love to win the major prize on Funniest Home Videos. I just know they would caption it something that they deemed funny, and yet would make me want to sink into the ground 'hippo dances zumba' or 'watch the jiggle' or something else highly inappropriate.
So this morning I started back on the porridge with a tsp of honey and a pinch of mixed spices. (I didn't have any straight cinnamon and it was actually nice like that!)
Morning tea was a carmens meusli bar, and lunch I have a salad and an apple ready and waiting.
Of course, as soon as I got the message come through on my phone today that tomorrow will have to be the last day of organised care for my boys I immediately thought 'Oh god, give me chocolate now!' and thankfully I didn't have any nearby!
I need to learn to shake off these immediate thoughts and to stop punishing and rewarding myself with food. It's an unhealthy habit and it never makes me feel better once the food has all gone.
Looking forward to seeing the change in 8 weeks.
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23-10-2012 12:09 #1
Zumba Diary- Week 1
Last edited by Mod-Nomsie; 23-10-2012 at 12:13.
23-10-2012 12:43 #2
Zumba Diary- Week 1
Thank goodness I'm not the only emotional eater! I'm a little bit scared to try this beginner DVD now lol!
I hope you get care for your boys soon, hun.
23-10-2012 15:50 #3
I look forward to seeing you embrace the new you Nomsie and Zumba it up with the rest of us.
We can all get there together, we just need to encourage each other to shake whatever bootie we have whenever old habits call to us!
23-10-2012 17:06 #4
Well done on your 5 am start.
23-10-2012 17:16 #5
Well, I can thank my little living alarm clocks for that! Not one (well, two!) known to miss a sunrise!
23-10-2012 18:12 #6
So, I have decided to turn today's misery into a workout session- I know, how usual, right!
Luckily my backup dancers have had an early night, and were well in bed before 6pm. Perfect opportunity to pop in the activate DVD and have another go at it today.
See, usually, I would gorge on food (and not good food either- if it full of sugar or deep fried, chances are I was emotionally stuffing it into my pie hole.) but today, I had a new technique to try, and I'm so glad I had it as an option. Despite the dark cloud lingering over my head, it did get my endorphins flowing and boosted my mood.
I've purged my feelings about todays setbacks re my children in another thread on the forum, just because I had to get those feelings out somewhere.
So, because I forgot to do this in my first post (whoops ) a bit about me. I'm 29 and I have twin 4 year old boys. I work .8 as a teacher and I used to be very sporty growing up. My mother was an area coordinator for weight watchers- so I was always quite thin and sporty.
When I met DP I was 22. I sort of forgot all my healthy habits, and settled into more of a lounge chair lifestyle with him. (Although I kept up with my sport.) When I was 24 we discovered I was pregnant. I couldn't play netball any more, but I did a pregnancy fitness class, although I had to have a certificate from my dr to say it was ok, yanno- just to go for a brisk walk and to do some work on a fitball.
Fastforward to their infancy and it's all just a blur. They didn't sleep, they woke to breastfeed all the time. I barely remember their first year, although I do remember trying to go for walks but they would just scream in the pram. It wasn't sucha huge issue though, because breastfeeding was good for me. I lost a LOT of weight:
This is when the boys were about 6 months old.
Of course, breastfeeding doesn't last forever, and they weaned at 20 months. What didn't slow down though, was my appetite. I was still eating like I was feeding 2 kids, and before I knew it, my weight went from an average of 74kg (although I believe I was less in that pic- I just never was one for weighing myself) to the current 94kg I am now:
Yep- that's a dress from Big City Chic.
So that's where I'm at, that's why I'm fat. Inactivity, because exercise with two demanding kids was hard- there was never time. Eating as though I was still breastfeeding two babies, and of course the good old emotional eating.
No more though! Although I don't think I'll ever go back to looking as thin as I do in the first pic, I would be happy just to really get red of this tyre I carry around my middle. And that's where Zumba comes in...!
23-10-2012 18:40 #7
23-10-2012 18:45 #8
Haha- what a great idea!!
23-10-2012 18:58 #9
Zumba Diary- Week 1
I love that you had "back up dancers", that made me smile. My little man at 18 months lets me do about 5mins of exercise by myself before he is trying to climb up my leg for a cuddle so my Zumba sessions will be planned around his sleeping schedule!
I sympathize with emotional eating.... Guilty I that too But no more!
23-10-2012 19:06 #10
Oh I miss day naps!
I just realised what is in the background of the pic of me now as a close up.. a framed picture of the word 'eat' OMG maybe I need to write underneath 'healthily'
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