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  1. #1
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    Default Heartbroken about my baby-shower - some guests are just jerks

    This might be a bit of a rant, and me and my 6 month belly might be a little hormonal but here it goes.

    I sent facebook invites to my friends as they are FB savy and it is how we normally do it these days. I had lots of people say they were attending and even at the RSVP deadline they confirmed their attendance again.

    Now my best-friend can't come because she is quitting her job and cant afford to walk down the road (same suburb) to the local pizza place. I know $18 is a lot for a fine oven baked pizza but come on, it was planned 4 months ago!

    Next another friend says she cant come all after the RSVP deadline and I have booked places etc... her dog needed an operation (i do sympathise) then she continues to say its mostly fine now, but she can't afford it either.

    Next another friend who was the first to rsvp... messages me and says she cant come she just realised that this weekend she has something important to do, then I tell her its ok because it is actually next weekend.... and she says thats even worse because her friends birthday is next weekend. Come on, how rude is that! I did include a DATE in my invites!

    In the invite I asked people not to bring any gifts as we have everything that we need, and the biggest gift they could give was their attendance and the new memories that we would make.

    I still have 10 people coming but I am so heartbroken that I want to cancel the entire thing, and just go to a hotel with hubby, order a darn $200 stunning baby shower cake and just eat it together, have lots of spa bubbles, and pretend champaign and snuggles!

    Then I think there are people coming that I care about that are nice, that wouldn't ever want to hurt us and feel that by cancelling it, I would be rather selfish.

    I just don't know, I am really hurting on the inside at the moment.
    I had so much planned, and surprises for everyone, and if im right... more people will cancel.

    Sorry about the evil rant, xoxoxox

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    biscotti is offline Winner 2012 - Naughtiest/Cheekiest Mod
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gurtling View Post

    Now my best-friend can't come because she is quitting her job and cant afford to walk down the road (same suburb) to the local pizza place. I know $18 is a lot for a fine oven baked pizza but come on, it was planned 4 months ago!

    Next another friend says she cant come all after the RSVP deadline and I have booked places etc... her dog needed an operation (i do sympathise) then she continues to say its mostly fine now, but she can't afford it either.
    Just a thought....if these are your best friends, and you really really want them to come and they've said they just can't afford it at the moment (for whatever reason), could you maybe shout them?

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    Hugs- but I think the problem with Facebook only invites is it comes across very casual? I think things like shower invites should be posted out ( jmo)

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    I think that yeah it's disappointing when people let you down but just concentrate on the ten people who are coming....

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    Tanzanite  (12-10-2012)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Elijahs Mum View Post
    Hugs- but I think the problem with Facebook only invites is it comes across very casual? I think things like shower invites should be posted out ( jmo)
    Exactly this ^^^ I was just about to say the same thing

    Hugs Hun hope you can still enjoy your day with the 10 lovely people making the effort xx

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    Tanzanite  (12-10-2012)

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    I would feel just like you. Baby showers only happen once in someones lifetime and i'd do anything to get to one if it were my best friend's!

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    Do your friends (that have cancelled) have kids of their own? I lost a few friends after having my first bub, I entered a different life stage than them and the friendship just wasn't the same anymore I don't mean to sound harsh but the friends that want to come to your baby shower are the friends you should be concentrating your time and efforts on. In the coming months you will make new friends (mothers groups etc) and if people want to be/stay friends with you they will make the effort. $18 is not a lot of money especially when you didn't ask for gifts either.

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    Quote Originally Posted by biscotti View Post
    Just a thought....if these are your best friends, and you really really want them to come and they've said they just can't afford it at the moment (for whatever reason), could you maybe shout them?
    I find it hard to believe that with the advanced warning someone couldn't afford $18. I respectfully suggest they aren't the OP's best friend, they are a $hithouse friend and no way in hell I'd be paying for them to go.

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    I think if she has said they don't require gifts then $18 is fair enough to pay for a pizza. OP - don't let it get you down, you have 10 great friends who still obviously care and want to be part of your pregnancy/baby journey. Concentrate on them, and those who don't come, well, that's their loss.

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