So how often do I drink? Everyday
How much do I drink? 2 glasses of red
I used to binge drink when I was younger....now that I am older I dont do that anymore. Sure there have been the odd occasions when bubs was born but grandparents were looking after kids while we were out (stayed overnight in town) and thats enough for me.
My problem is I dont get hangovers unless I drink waaaaay in excess. DP can have a couple of glasses of red and will get the dry horrors and a headache in the morning.
For me its more about I hate feeling so awful the next day that I cant play with my kids so I just dont want to binge.
Two glasses are enough for me....sure I could have more but the reality is I have school and kinder runs, a baby, a business to run and its just not worth the fuzzy head the next day.
The two glasses helps me wind down from the day when the kids are in bed. And I enjoy it.
I am sure you will get people on here that are going to judge you (wouldnt be BH without them ). I am certainly not judging you and I am pretty sure you are giving youself a hard enough time.
I have no issue with a couple of glasses at night....but thats just me.
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11-10-2012 09:36 #11
Last edited by FluffyDucks; 11-10-2012 at 09:37. Reason: because there is no such thing as 'bunge' drinking :p
11-10-2012 10:02 #12
OP I have had issues with drinking too much in the passt. Before I had kids I partied hard. Every weekend and I would also get drunk through the week. I thought it was just an age thing and I would grow out of it. After I had my kiddies I would feel so guilty when I drank. I had DS at 22 and DD at 23. I would get drunk once aweek on the weekend with friends etc at home (didn't go out ever). And I would have maybe 6 beers through the week here and there but not get drunk. i hated how I felt after getting drunk. I would feel so miserable and sick (with anxiety and fear) and guilty and it would take a week to feel ok again and then I was doing it all over... It was no way to live and I was miserable. I am not saying this is how you drink or feel, just sharing my story.
I tried to stop drinking altogether by myself and it never lasted. I could neer last more than about a week without wanting to drink to wind down or have a good time etc. So I went to AA. It was the best thing I could have ever done. I spent 16 months in AA sober and it was awesomme. I got my **** together and I matured alot and I left AA. I left AA in April and I have been drunk (not anything like I used to get but had a few too many) once, it was last Saturday night at a fundraiser I attended. Apart fromt that I have maybe 3 or 4 ciders in a week over dinner or something with DH...
I discovered that I felt like I needed alcohol to have a good time or to cope with the bad times when in reality it never helped any of that... If you think you have a problem seek help... If you don't think you have a problem just try not to get to that point again so you don't have to feel like this again.
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11-10-2012 10:51 #13Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2009
OP Don't beat yourself up. It sounds like there was no harm done, and - as you said - your baby was safe and cared for.
Having children doesn't make you stop being human, and sometimes we all do things that aren't the 'best' things to do. In the scheme of things I would say that it's not a big deal.
I'm going through IVF atm, which has severely curtailed my drinking. But I do enjoy wine normally, and would probably have some a couple of times a week. I don't normally get drunk these days, but I did when I was younger (I'm 34 now) and even now I enjoy the odd girls night out with a few too many cocktails/ wines.
When DD was born I was very conflicted about my old self and new self, and I had in my head that mums didn't drink or go out. I got myself so wound up about it that DH ended up saying (in a very kind way) that he didn't have a baby in order to lose his wife's identity, and my mum ended up telling me that she often left me with her mum when she wanted some alone time! (Again, all in a very lovely way).
Well, I went out to a birthday party with something to 'prove' to my non-parent friends (nearly all of them), that I was no longer pregnant and hadn't become a 'boring' mum and could have fun with the best of them. Obviously I hadn't factored in my dodgy drinking tolerance after 9mths of non drinking, and was plastered after a few champagnes and ended up puking - something I have never ever done when drunk.
I was mortified, and convinced that meant I was a terrible mum. Of course it meant nothing of the sort (a terrible drinker, maybe...) and DD was looked after that night, DH was driving and looking after me, and everyone was fine.
I think there's a period of adjustment when you've had a baby, and I'd say to cut yourself some slack. It sounds as if you're going through a tough time, and heaping guilt on top of that won't help.
I'd just say to learn from it, try to pace yourself better next time, and as long as your baby is being safely looked after then you don't have to put pressure on yourself to be a saint at all times.
11-10-2012 11:47 #14
OP, I think you are being too hard on yourself! I don't have any kids, but I'm sure most, if not all mums put themselves under much tougher scrutiny.
I think deep down you know if this is a problem or not.
I'm certainly not advocating excessive alcohol consumption or anything, but for certain people stress can cause numerous problems if not kept under control. And if having a few drinks (or a few too many) once in a while helps to ease the stress, it's not altogether a terrible thing (unless of course, alcohol become a problem).
11-10-2012 12:20 #15Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2011
Don't beat yourself up over it, I would try and not get so intoxicated but a few drinks IMO is fine.
11-10-2012 12:40 #16Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2009
Most days I have 2 glasses of white wine while I am getting dinner ready. If we are with friends (maybe every 2 or 3 weeks) I will have maybe 3 or 4 glasses. Any more than that I have an awful hangover and I hate hate hate it because the next day is basically wasted. There is too much to do to have a wasted day. I do really enjoy having a couple of glasses though!
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11-10-2012 16:41 #17
I'm not really much of a drinker anyway but I do go on a bit of a bender occasionally. For me, this happens when my DD isn't in my care and I'm out with friends.
I don't drink around her. I might have a single glass of wine while im cooking if im using it in the meal but otherwise I do not drink while I'm caring for her.
11-10-2012 17:53 #18
Give yourself a break OP - you're making me feel like a full blown lush!
Baby ok - check.
You're ok - check.
Let off a little steam - check.
Obligatory hangover to check yourself - check.
I haven't had a drink this week. But last weekend we had friends over and I lost count of the bottles of red we drank. It was great, enjoying time with friends, lots of fabulous wine and conversation. I don't do it all the time but being a mum is certainly not going to stop me having the odd bender. It's in my nature to have a blow out every now and then.
11-10-2012 18:11 #19-
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
- In a house
I don't drink much. My husband works late nights ans its no fun drinkin on my own. I might have a glass of white wine when going out to dinner twice a year and thats it.
I too wouldn't beat myself up over it. Only if it becomes a regular event and you wont do anything about it to stop the habit, THEN Id feel guilty.
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