Best tip my son's speech therapist gave.... BIG plate but SMALL amounts of food. Don't make her plate overwhelming, kids who don't like to eat (like my son who is 5 yrs and 14.4kg and lives on air) are much more drawn to little "bits" of food on a huge plate.
If you were handed a plate with piles of food on it, and you didn't want to eat, you would feel so much pressure to eat it all.
Give her lots of healthy stuff in the morning and lunch, and just give her teeny tiny portions of whatever you're having for dinner.
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28-09-2012 12:25 #21
28-09-2012 13:14 #22
yes! My SIL is a nutritionist/naturpopath and she says similar, she thinks that at about 12- 18 months the babies "caveman" instinct to survive kicks in and they will only eat what they recognise to be safe, which is usually when parents like to try their toddler on new foods and why they are sometimes resistant - she thinks feeding them a wide variety of foods before they are 1 ( from 6 -12 months ) conditions their brain to accept these foods as common and also to try feed whole foods ( not purees after 6 months ) so they recognise the fruits/veggies/meats in their whole form
28-09-2012 13:28 #23
Maybe I just need to relax more, and I think the idea of a big plate and small amounts of food might just trick her into thinking she has less.
28-09-2012 21:22 #24Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
My heart goes out to you, my DD is a terrible eater and was diagnosed by age 2 as having oral aversion. Meal times have been a nightmare for years in our home and I have just had to learn to let go and relax. Our DD has only just weaned from the bottle probably 3 months ago, on medical advice we were forced to keep her on formula as her diet is so limited. She is now 5 and refuses the bottle so she is now having pentavite multivitamin liquid upon recomendation from our pead. Some of the tactics we have found sucessful with our DD have been to:
Minimise attention at meal times - I literally put a plate of food down in front of her and simply walk away. If she eats it great, if she doesnt no point in getting upset.
If she does eat a meal or try a new food again we minimise the attention as we find if we make a fuss it puts her off.
She prefers eating alone so we allow it.
Eating in front of the TV has proven a positive as she is distracted and we can often feed her without her really noticing it.
Some of these tactics break all the 'rules' but when you have a child who hates food you just do what you can do to get by.
28-09-2012 22:00 #25
im not sure if you have tried it, but would she be open to eating a "dinner" meal at lunch, and lunch at dinner time?
I think i read somewhere about your DS may not be too happy with that suggestion though?
No real advice, other that just find some system and stick to it consistently, try not to stress too much...she will come around The other suggestions about multivitamins, getting her to help, smoothies and juices etc sound good too.
28-09-2012 22:17 #26
My children don't drink juice. They have the the V8 juices occasionally, usually in school holidays when they come shopping with me.
In your case I would leave her be for a while and stop fighting. My DD (6 then) was forced to eat fried rice by her grandmother and Auntie when she flat out refused she was stripped naked and thrown in the bath (her words). She now 18 months later flat out refuses rice and any cooked vegies apart from potato. She has started to eat raw carrot. She has huge food issues.
I guess I am saying be careful. I know they need to eat, but sometimes the pressure put on can do more damage in the long run.
I would try swapping her meals around and see if she is more open in the morning to other foods and when she is tired in the afternoon give her the porridge.
Another thing I would do is have a plate of already prepared fruits, vegies nuts if she can have them other finger food that she can help herself to through out the day. She does not have to ask to go and get this food it is just there for if and when she wants it.
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29-09-2012 13:59 #27Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
As I child I wasn't a big eater and am really emotionally scarred with the way my parents and grandparents forced me to eat. They were all forceful, especially with food I didn't like (soup for example) and I was often in tears and vomiting. It's a really terrible memory for me.
I would suggest just being totally "normal" about it, especially with a 5 year old, put food on the table, ensure you eat as a family, take time and enjoy the meals, make it fun and she will latch on.
I really urge everyone I know now who has children that are not big eaters to not force them and not give in and just let them eat what they want (juice, lollies, chips) for fear of starving them.
Sorry if I sound like I'm preaching..
02-10-2012 02:19 #28
My older kids (9 and 11yo) have never eaten much in the afternoons or for dinner. They do, however, eat a good breakfast, morning tea and lunch.
I have taken to giving them weetbix or porridge for breakfast (they both love them), an apple, carrot and mandarin for morning tea and crunch and sip, and a banana, muffin, dinner leftovers (lasagne, mince - stuffed full of veges ... you get the idea) and a yoghurt. They will occasionally have some toast after school and only if I am making something that they truly love for dinner will they eat. DD loves a piping hot red curry with veges adn rice and DS love chilli con carne and salad tortilla wraps, so to entice them to eat dinner I make these reasonably regularly.
They are both very healthy, active, a healthy weight, bright and sleep well. This is just how their bodies need their food intake spread.
I gave up worrying about them a long time ago ...
02-10-2012 07:43 #29
Well an update. Since relaxing, we have had some successes. On saturday night she actually tried some pasta with passata and she LIKED it. OMG. I cried little tears of joy
We have also had a big chat about mummy worrying about her, and not meaning to upset her at dinner time. Which seems to have helped. She is also excited about making some savoury muffins when she gets home from school.
All in all, I am feeling so much happier about meal times.
02-10-2012 08:14 #30Senior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
I agree with what the others have said. We give our children breakfast, morning tea, lunch afternoon tea, dinner (and desert which is yoghurt if they eat all their dinner) Outside of that unless its a special occassion she gets nothing else. To begin with our DD would hardly eat anything and now she'll almost eat anything as she knows she gets nothing else. I don't even give fruit instead as I don't think fruit is very healthy after 2 pieces because of all the fructose in it. (I'm not saying fruit is unhealthy it just is if given lots and lots of it all the time).
Whatever you do, you need to stand your ground. If she knows she's going to get what she wants by refusing she will keep doing it because it's working.
Just read your update Thats great that things seem to be on the up and up. It's good that youve found something that's worked for your DD
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