Hi ladies, I'm 18 weeks pregnant today and had a dream pregnancy so far (no sickness or fatigue etc) and for this reason I don't "feel" pregnant. I know I am and my growing bump reminds me of this fact (have felt any movement yet, it's my first). My question is, did finding out the sex of your baby help with bonding? Or was it the case once you felt any flutters or movement you felt connected and it all finally felt real? TIA
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13-09-2012 17:01 #1
Did finding out the sex help you bond?
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MsImpatient (27-09-2012)
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13-09-2012 17:08 #2
Re: Did finding out the sex help you bond?
For me- yes it helped me bond with my son as I could visualise him and choose a name. I felt I knew his personality through the wriggles and kicks and just wanted to know who was growing inside me.
Definately finding out the sex this time around too.
But everyone is different and plenty of my friends didn't find out the sex.
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13-09-2012 17:09 #3
Did finding out the sex help you bond?
it helped my husband bond more than myself. I had m/s daily until about 26 weeks, felt her move from about 17 weeks and absolutely adored her when I saw the second line at 8 dpo.
We thought dd was a boy from the start, so a cheeky 17 week scan was a huge shock!we were just both very happy to have a healthy baby, as out first pregnancy was a missed m/c.
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rayroo (14-09-2012)
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13-09-2012 17:20 #4
Did finding out the sex help you bond?
Definitely!! Especially as I thought he was a girl for the first 20ish weeks, it's really helped me know my little man.
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13-09-2012 17:28 #5
Did finding out the sex help you bond?
I found out with our first, not our second, and have found out this time.
For me, I needed to know in order to bond. Sounds silly, but I really struggled to wrap my head around it all when DD was suddenly here. Where as when DS was born I had already bonded, he had a name, all of that. I personally just need that kind of thing
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13-09-2012 17:29 #6
Did finding out the sex help you bond?
I was 8 weeks when I finally realized I was actually pregnant with our 2nd. At 11 weeks we had flown out to Bali for 2 weeks. We came back 3 days before our scan at 13.5 weeks.
The whole 5 weeks I was not connected to the pregnancy, I felt perfectly fine no symptoms.
Then at 19 weeks had a scan found out he was a boy and still was like nah no baby then I popped out and felt kicks and I was like oh my lord there is a baby in there and after 12 weeks of denial I only have 4 months to get used to the idea ;-)
It's weird when you don't actually feel pregnant, it's either because you can't possibly be or something is wrong with the baby so you stress.
In reality we are just lucky to have an easy ride
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13-09-2012 19:38 #7
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I don't think it made much difference to me for bonding purposes. I had mimimal pregnancy symptoms (boobs got bigger), but found the 12 week scan helpful to make things feel 'real'. I felt movement at 17 weeks though and that was very exciting to have private moments to myself with baby.
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13-09-2012 19:52 #8
Did finding out the sex help you bond?
In a way it did, I enjoy thinking of my daughter and what it's going to be like having a little girl running around underfoot. My husband and I picked out our names and I brought a few pink things.
Before that I just couldn't really imagine what our baby might be like. It gave my imagination a jumping off point
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13-09-2012 19:59 #9
Re: Did finding out the sex help you bond?
For me not really no, as I was so convinced DS was a girl that finding out he was a boy really threw me and I think started off my bonding issues that didn't resolve until weeks after he arrived.
I'm very glad I found out before birth though.
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13-09-2012 20:00 #10
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I found it helped me. I very much want this baby but had really been struggling with the pregnancy. Between the m/s and pain I just felt horrible the whole time. When we found out we are having a boy i honestly felt like I started to bond with him straight away.
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