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  1. #121
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubmum View Post
    What a load of tosh... I had to drop out of Uni because I couldnt' afford to stay there, and like 3 times. I love people who live in handed to me on a plate world, and make up ridiculous laws that profoundly affect others. The real world is nothing like that..only in make believe we have lots of money land.
    Exactly. If a child wants to get a degree and the bio parents can afford to support that child in doing so, what is so wrong about the law saying they SHOULD do so? So they DON'T have to drop out?

    If the parents CAN'T afford to support the kid, they will be able to apply for Government income support. That's the way the system works and personally I don't think it's that unfair. Nearly every person I know who went to uni straight from school received some sort of financial support from their parents- someone mentioned accommodation, which is an enormous expense, especially if you live in Sydney where accommodation costs take up about 50% of the average young person's income.

    This is coming from someone who grew up in a widowed family where there was no second income and the first was scant, so yes I do know what it's like not to be supported by one's parents because they have no choice. I know it's possible to get an education etc without that, but it puts you at a huge disadvantage to the middle class demographic whjo make up the majority of higher education participants.

    I also know how it breaks my father's heart to this day that he couldn't support us in pursuing the dreams we had. He would have given his right arm to help out with out uni costs, but it just wasn't possible. Personally, I have no sympathy whatsoever for these parents in question who cry "unfair" when CS continues simply because they want to focus on their new family now. Sure, perhaps it should be a choice, but I myself would want nothing to do with any father willing to make that choice. That's just me.

    It also doesn't leave much "choice" for the decent custodial parent who actually believes that parenting doesn't end simply because your kid's age hits a certain number. But good on those who do, how liberating that must be.

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  3. #122
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alexander Beetle View Post
    CS is paid in arrears so it's actually the custodial parents money. Rest assured, the money has already been spent on food or clothing, unless the child is starved and naked. My child costs more than the $200 a month I get, believe me.
    I'm not talking about $200 per month! The money he pays is absurd and should adequately provide for all the boys needed but it didn't, why? because the ex was either hopeless with money in general or cared too much about herself and her new boyfriend rather than putting her kids needs first. The school fees weren't being paid, the kids would be in desperate need of haircuts and the list goes on. While there may be dead beat fathers out there who don't give a toss or want to pay for their kids, the father in question is a good father who loves his kids, he is actively involved in his kids upbringing, running them to sports etc as well as paying more than his fair share in maintenance and the rest. All situations are different which is why it would be an ideal solution if all cases were treated individually.

  4. #123
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    Default *Spin off* How would you like to see the CS system organised?

    Quote Originally Posted by MermaidSister View Post
    Exactly. If a child wants to get a degree and the bio parents can afford to support that child in doing so, what is so wrong about the law saying they SHOULD do so? So they DON'T have to drop out?

    If the parents CAN'T afford to support the kid, they will be able to apply for Government income support. That's the way the system works and personally I don't think it's that unfair. Nearly every person I know who went to uni straight from school received some sort of financial support from their parents- someone mentioned accommodation, which is an enormous expense, especially if you live in Sydney where accommodation costs take up about 50% of the average young person's income.

    This is coming from someone who grew up in a widowed family where there was no second income and the first was scant, so yes I do know what it's like not to be supported by one's parents because they have no choice. I know it's possible to get an education etc without that, but it puts you at a huge disadvantage to the middle class demographic whjo make up the majority of higher education participants.

    I also know how it breaks my father's heart to this day that he couldn't support us in pursuing the dreams we had. He would have given his right arm to help out with out uni costs, but it just wasn't possible. Personally, I have no sympathy whatsoever for these parents in question who cry "unfair" when CS continues simply because they want to focus on their new family now. Sure, perhaps it should be a choice, but I myself would want nothing to do with any father willing to make that choice. That's just me.

    It also doesn't leave much "choice" for the decent custodial parent who actually believes that parenting doesn't end simply because your kid's age hits a certain number. But good on those who do, how liberating that must be.
    I think you'll find bubmum is actually disagreeing with your 'logic'.

  5. #124
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    I realise that. My point was that, well, she sounds bitter about having had to drop out of uni 3 times, so i'm saying that this would happen less to other kids if their non-custodial parents were prepared to keep supporting them while they study- since the government simply won't if you are at home. Yet some seem to think that a child hitting 18, even if they are still being supported accommodation-wise by custodial parent, shouldn't receive another cent of assistance from the non-custodial. Which I disagree with- the custodial parent is still paying for the roof over their head, utilities and probably meals etc. While the kid is probably working part time and paying their own general expenses, a lot is still being paid for by the parent they are living with.

    Hence why I disagree that non-custodial should suddenly be able to cease payments and hand it all over to the other. I mean the kid was probably working an afternoon job throughout most of high school anyway.

    Bu thank you for pointing that out anyway.

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  7. #125
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    Quote Originally Posted by MermaidSister View Post
    I realise that. My point was that, well, she sounds bitter about having had to drop out of uni 3 times, so i'm saying that this would happen less to other kids if their non-custodial parents were prepared to keep supporting them while they study- since the government simply won't if you are at home. Yet some seem to think that a child hitting 18, even if they are still being supported accommodation-wise by custodial parent, shouldn't receive another cent of assistance from the non-custodial. Which I disagree with- the custodial parent is still paying for the roof over their head, utilities and probably meals etc. While the kid is probably working part time and paying their own general expenses, a lot is still being paid for by the parent they are living with.

    Hence why I disagree that non-custodial should suddenly be able to cease payments and hand it all over to the other. I mean the kid was probably working an afternoon job throughout most of high school anyway.

    Bu thank you for pointing that out anyway.
    But at 18 both parents surely are non-custodial parents. Therefore if the parent decided to support the child, that's their choice.

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    Default *Spin off* How would you like to see the CS system organised?

    Quote Originally Posted by BlissedOut View Post
    But at 18 both parents surely are non-custodial parents. Therefore if the parent decided to support the child, that's their choice.
    So will you be kicking out your kids on their 18th birthday? In my situation, I probably won't have this choice as my child has just been diagnosed as being on the severe end of the autism spectrum. His father on the other hand is trying to wipe his hands of him now. With rentals being hard to find and things becoming more expensive, kids are staying at home longer and longer. I paid. $100 board as soon as I got a job but I can guarantee that it didn't cover all my expenses. I was only earning less then $200 a week as a 1st year apprentice though so couldn't give more.

  9. #127
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlissedOut View Post
    But at 18 both parents surely are non-custodial parents. Therefore if the parent decided to support the child, that's their choice.
    So if an 18 in uni cannot afford sydney rent they should either a) drop out or b) the parent that has been good enough to support their child's studies just has to pay for everything?

  10. #128
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    Quote Originally Posted by ItWasntMe View Post
    So will you be kicking out your kids on their 18th birthday? In my situation, I probably won't have this choice as my child has just been diagnosed as being on the severe end of the autism spectrum. His father on the other hand is trying to wipe his hands of him now. With rentals being hard to find and things becoming more expensive, kids are staying at home longer and longer. I paid. $100 board as soon as I got a job but I can guarantee that it didn't cover all my expenses. I was only earning less then $200 a week as a 1st year apprentice though so couldn't give more.
    No way, I won't be kicking them out, in fact I hope my kids live with me until they marry and after that even.

    They just will cease being my legal and financial responsibility. It'll be my choice from that point on to provide for them.

    In the case of your son he will qualify for a disability pension most likely and depending on his level of dependency you may be given a payment for being his carer.

  11. #129
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    So if an 18 in uni cannot afford sydney rent they should either a) drop out or b) the parent that has been good enough to support their child's studies just has to pay for everything?
    I honestly am pretty ignorant about the system here, but I know living expenses could be tacked onto a student loan in NZ.

  12. #130
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    I do agree that after 18 legally they are no longer the parent's financial responsibility. But if the parents are no longer together and one parent is helping their child (bc we all know how expense it is to live, especially when studying) I don't necessarily agree with the idea that they are choosing to let them live there so the other parent shouldn't chuck them $50 here and there.

    Bc while it is a choice, it kind of isn't. If my child was renting while studying and came to me and said mum, can I come home, otherwise I'll need to drop out. For me there is no choice.

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