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  1. #1
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    Default 9 year old says he's being bullied and doesn't want to be alive anymore.

    I took my son to school today and he didn't want to get out of the car. Once his siblings had left he burst into tears and said he can't go in because he's being bullied. He said its his grade but also one child in particular. He said its verbal in class and physical out of class.

    I tried to get him to go in and said I would come in at lunch time and talk to his teacher.

    He got more and more upset. He said he's retarded, dumb, stupid, wishes he didn't exist.

    So I took him home and now he is playing happily with his toddler sister who he just adores.

    I feel like climbing into bed and having a good cry. I don't even know where to start. He has been saying he's unwell most days trying to get out of school. Last week he came home after going to sick bay.

    He has a few 'friends' who will come over and play or stay the night but won't play with him at school. It's like it's cool to pick on him. I guess because he's sensitive and doesn't stand up to them.

    Any one have any advice on what to do next?

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    Default 9 year old says he's being bullied and doesn't want to be alive anymore.

    Sorry I have no advice, but my heart just broke reading this.

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    Kids can be awful.

    I'd be setting up and urgent meeting with his teacher and principal and also looking at options for moving him to another school. I know a lot of people think they should deal with the problems head on, but many adults don't have the capacity to do that, let alone a 9yo child.

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    Default 9 year old says he's being bullied and doesn't want to be alive anymore.

    I would definitely see his teacher and even the principal.
    Gosh I can only imagine how much it must be tearing you up inside. How awful.
    In the meantime, I'd have a good talk with him, and tell him that what these kids are saying are not true, that he is a lovely boy, focus on the positive things about him so that he can see that they are wrong.

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    Default Re: 9 year old says he's being bullied and doesn't want to be alive anymore.

    Your poor son

    My nephew went through something similar. My sister put him in an after school activity which made his self confidence soar and he made new friends, my sister also goes in and helps in his classroom once a week and the bullying has eased up alot.

    I'm not really sure what to suggest but that is what worked for them.

    It just breaks your heart that you can't protect them all the time doesn't it.

    Please give your ds a huge hug from me.

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    Organise a meeting with the teacher today. It is important that you and the school work together to ensure he is back at school - each day a child has off school because of bullying, it's harder and harder to get them back.
    If you are unhappy with the teachers response request a meeting with the teacher and principal. Sometimes, these issues are easily solved - sometimes not. Your DS needs to know that it's not ok, he is being listened to but that he also needs to be given the skills to speak up to help solve the problem.

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    I would meet his his teacher right away. Is there more than one class? if so say you want him moved right away. If not say you want them to tell you what they are going to do and if it's not enough I would look at moving schools. Bullying like this can affect his whole life. My daughter had one bad year at school and I look back and wish I had demanded she be put in another class.

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    Build him up too, we do a family evening every Monday night, often with my MIL and all her kids/grandkids. When our niece was being bullied we all wrote things we loved about her and put them in a hat, she pulled them out one by one and read them. It was really special for her to be reminded about all the things we love about her.

    I really believe if our family show us how much they love us, the hate we experience elsewhere is dulled by this.

    I'd also look into counselling, when talking with the school and principal they may be able to point you in the right direction with this.

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    I definitely agree about getting him into an after school activity. Something like Scouts is great for kids who're having trouble within their own school.
    Have that conversation with the teachers and principal.
    But honestly if he's at the point of breaking down and saying that he doesn't want to live I'd seriously consider changing his school. Asap. Because bullying will often still take place once the kids are found out. It just becomes more insidious and hidden.

    Not to mention the fact that he's said that it's physical. That would have me seeing red and I'd be in the principal's office before you could blink! I was teased all through primary school and high school (thanks, red hair ) but it was never physical. If it had been, I'd have felt there was no escape and kids are doing drastic things at a younger and younger age these days.

    I hope the poor little guy gets some relief soon, it sounds like he's in a terrible spot .

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    Default 9 year old says he's being bullied and doesn't want to be alive anymore.

    Thank you I really appreciate the advice.

    We put him into scouts to raise his confidence and he loves it However his bully is there too! In his class, in his scouts group and his footy team

    I will talk to his teacher tonight and set up a meeting.

    There is another class he could move to. Although that won't stop this child getting to him at lunch I guess it will help a bit?


 

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