Welcome 6. Wow almost 7 years is a long time to wait We went 54 cycles, so just over 4 years for our first child and it was hell.
We have been ttc for 14 months with our 3rd babe and as you can see in my sig, have had a m/c and an EP in less than a year.
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19-08-2012 11:53 #11
19-08-2012 11:55 #12
Stretched - nothing will fix my POAS addiction It's tough asking the what if's, all I tell myself is that a vast majority of m/c has nothing to do with what we have or haven't done. I think it's natural though, after multiple losses to question if it's our fault
19-08-2012 13:33 #13
Big hugs for everyone who is in here. It sure is a long frustrating journey!
I've had 4 early losses and have been TTC for 3 years next month. I think my record has been 4w 4d. Some days I find myself thinking that because they were so early, they don't really count. And other days I wonder if I actually fall into the 'recurrent miscarriage' category.
Either way, I'm so sick of Doctors and Specialists that never seem able to tell me what's going on (I also have non-fertility related issues that may or may not be directly or indirectly affecting fertility.....Pffft!)
To be honest, the longer I TTC the more I start to believe that all the struggle and obstacles are there like a huge flashing sign saying "This isn't meant to happen"
Does anyone else feel that way?
19-08-2012 14:53 #14
Hi 6 Years and Magicmud. I'm sorry that you find yourself here but hopefully we'll be able to share support and hopefully all get our sticky babies one day.
I've been very lucky that in the last few months I've met people or friends have shared the struggles they went through to get their sticky babies, and it has helped me to stay hopeful. It's hard some days though and I'm comparatively new to the journey at just 14 months trying for number 2.
MagicMud - your losses very much do count, have they been able to rule out implantation issues/causes like low progesterone or uterine adhesions? I'm guessing though after 4 years you've probably had every test under the sun.
19-08-2012 22:15 #15
I honestly don't know what can be ruled out. I've suspected a progesterone issue due to having quite a light AF, but the FS doesn't seem to think it's an issue, even though I technically haven't had any full cycle tracking BTs done. So I'm not sure where his confidence comes from with that? I've also had some funny things going on with my blood (elevated white cells and platelets) but my hematologist isn't sure what's going on with that. He essentially told me to wait and see if it gets any worse. I also have hypothyroidism which is currently under control, but my Endocrinologist thinks I may have thyroid antibodies even though they have not shown up any tests.
DH has anti-sperm antibodies, but again, not sure what is happening with that because the last test he had done showed no anti-bodies present. This is impossible as anti-bodies don't magically disappear!
And lastly, my AMH was borderline low in 2010, but then went up significantly in 2011. This is also impossible! lol
Any one of these things could be interfering with implantation (progesterone, thyroid, potential blood disorder, poor sperm quality/defect, or poor egg quality), or it could be something else entirely.
Basically, nothing has been ruled out or confirmed in any definitive way.
Even DH's antibodies (at 25% IGA) were considered 'equivocal', which means it could be interfering with conception or it could not be.
A more simple answer to your question is... Buggered if I know!!
20-08-2012 10:01 #16
That sounds very frustrating - if your hypothyroidism is stable then hopefully you don't have thyroid antibodies. Someone close to me has Hashimotos and it is very hard to keep her levels stable and medication is continually being adjusted. But the blood things sounds like there could be a different immune system thing going on which could be linked. It's so hard when you've got so many doctors, you must just want to sit them all down in a room together and get them to throw around everything going on and see if they can work out a plan of attack.
I got the brush off from my GP when I was questioning my progesterone levels with my last pregnancy. When I started bleeding at CD32, I asked for cummulative HCG and progesterone, he begrudgingly did the prog and then said the levels were fine but I'm sure he said they were one 2.something. The ultrasound never found a CL cyst (which produces the progesterone) but when I asked my GP and OB about this they both basically said that I wouldn't have falled pregnant at all if there wasn't enough progesterone. If I'm in this situation again I'm going to be a lot more pro-active because if that was true then they would never put women on progesterone support!
If I don't get my BFP next week then I'll be talking to my OB again about a hysteroscopy to make sure the D&C didn't leave any scarring. I've got everything crossed that I don't need to though...
20-08-2012 10:08 #17Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2011
Thank god you all came just when i needed it most but so sorry there has to be this thread at all.
Here i am thinking 'poor me' who has been TTC for 4 years, IVF, one missed miscarraige and now back to square one with PCO when you ladies have been trying for longer and had far more miscarriages than anyone should.
I guess it's just nice to know you not alone when u feel your the last one on earth who isn't pregnant or had a baby.
Last week should've been our baby's 1st birthday, apparently your not meant to think like that but it 's hard.
Anyway, hopefully together we make this crap journey a little more bearable.
Thinking of you all and hoping some mircales comes our way.
20-08-2012 10:52 #18
Hi 6, wow what a hard road you have travelled. Six years is just so long. You poor lady
MagicMud how frustrating not to have any clear answers at all What's Letrozole? I'm guessing you're having fertility treatment now?
spud four years is a long time too. Are you doing IVF again?
Well still waiting here for this miscarriage to start, hoping I don't have to wait too long (or have a D&C which I'm irrationally terrified of). Feeling very sad and want it to be over.
20-08-2012 11:13 #19Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2009
Thanks for starting the thread, Delirium. I think it can be so much harder having a miscarriage when it has taken you such a long time to get pregnant in the first place. I had my first miscarriage last month, after 16-17mths of TTC, and it was just awful. DH described it as seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and then being hit by a train.
I'm about to start a frozen embryo cycle, but I can't summon up any enthusiasm for it at all. I just feel weary of the whole process.
I have 6 frozen embryos left, and after that we have said we will stop trying. I just want this time of life to be over now - one way or another. It's consumed everything and I just want life back.
The weird part is that it's now 4 weeks since the D&C and for the past 4 weeks I have actually felt normal again, as I haven't been on fertility drugs. I've been drinking wine, feeling human, and I'm dreading going back to that black hole of fertility treatment.
Erghh. Sorry for the depressing 'me' post. DH is all positive about the next cycle, or it working at some point, but I've totally lost any connection with the IVF being at all related to there being a baby at the end of it. I feel like even if I got a BFP now I wouldn't feel anything, and it wouldn't mean that a baby was coming.
20-08-2012 11:33 #20
GirlX I feel EXACTLY the same about BFPs. They are completely meaningless to me - well, actually they mean that a mc is coming
I know what you mean about the black hole, I HATE the drugs and tests and well, everything about it really.
Seems so completely surreal that some people can just have s3x, get pg and have a baby
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