I want to thank you for teaching me something. I thought the book was entirely useless, I have now learnt it makes great fire wood. Any one who sells a one size fits all approach to raising children needs a good kick up the butthole
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13-08-2012 17:48 #31
13-08-2012 18:00 #32
A newborn is hard work, and should not be left alone in a room crying themselves to sleep (she does say be prepared for crying, but call it what you want if it makes you feel better) Disgusting!
And yes, I've read about the poo and vomit. Please explain how it is taken out of context!
Last edited by BigRedV; 13-08-2012 at 18:02.
13-08-2012 18:00 #33-
- Join Date
- Sep 2009
Do not forget that your child has been with you 24/7 for 9 months and suddenly it gets ripped away and is expected to sleep through from day one, because mum can't handle the pressure.
I'm keen to see how well the book will work for you once you actually have held your precious little bub in your arms.
Having a baby isn't an easy job. If people don't think they can handle sleep deprivation, than they should think again before having kids.
I have read the book and it SO went against every mothers instinct I had. I am usually a no-nonsense woman, but TZ's approach was too inhumane even for me.
The thing that got to me the most was the part about vomiting babies who vomit attention. Physically this isn't really possible for little bubs unless they actually can manipulate their hand to stick their finger in the back of their mouth;
Change the sheets, change the clothes, don't make any eye contact and don't say a word. Pretend the vomiting isn't getting at you. No matter how hard your bub cries while you're changing the linen, don't take him/her out of the cot and don't even try to pat her/him. Completely ignore bubs and all will be well.
Errrrr yeah right.
13-08-2012 18:10 #34Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
to me, if my baby is crying then my baby is crying! whether its a protest or not, its still crying.
she doesn't actually say that you should take from it what you want, she states the 'importance' of following the routines to a T!
when i was pregnant i thought it seemed good, but unless you have had a baby before, you can't know what it's like to hear your baby cry and do nothing, whether its a 'protest' or not.
i do think that if parents can stick to it and it makes their baby sleep then fine, but what have they sacrificed to get there and they don't know what the long-term implications could be.
In my opinion, anyone who states that you can win against your baby at something doesnt truly have your baby's best interests at heart; parenting is not a competition.
13-08-2012 18:13 #35
13-08-2012 18:14 #36-
- Join Date
- Apr 2012
First of all each to their own and if you don't want to follow SOS then thats your prerogative.
However it sounds like there are other issues at play: you're stressed, bub isn't a great sleeper, you in your heart don't believe in the methodology.
Considering that, and I don't mean I be rude, I wonder if you tried to implement the routine correctly. And that's ok if you didn't, I just think folks need to be honest about why something didn't work instead of just bagging it out.
Just a few common problems with implementing SOS (not saying all apply to you).
- people don't read the book from cover to cover first and as a result make mess ups (eg implement the wrong settling advice for the wrong age group). Anyone who believes you simply leave your bub to cry themselves to sleep hasn't read the whole book.
- some feed their babies to sleep instead of putting them down awakw
- some don't use comforters which doesn't help. Or they use them at home but not when bub is sleeping in the pram/car etc.
- Some don't implement the crying advice accurately. Never leave a baby with an emotional cry.
- some start at the wrong time . Eg during a growth spurt or too early for their bub (I started at 8 weeks as I wanted bub to get through the 6 week growth spurt)
- some don't give the routine enough time (it can take up to a week for things to fall into place).
- some don't take into consideration their bub may have a medical condition (eg reflux)
- some try the wrong routine and it is hard for bub to stay awake/go to sleep on schedule. If your bub is smaller they might need an earlier routine. If they are larger they might need an older routine.
- people ignore the dreamfeed
- some people don't use commonsense. If you are certain your bub is hungry (it's easy to confuse hungry with other things) then feed them. If they are having trouble adjusting to new sleep times try and slowly ease them into it (eg by going as close as you can before the tired signs start to go).
It doesn't work for some and it
Works for others. My bub only ever cried a couple of times. Slept 8-9 hours from 7 weeks (bf) and 12 hours straight from about 3 months. He rarely cries from being tired/hungry. He self settles. Doesn't wake through the night.
13-08-2012 18:15 #37
13-08-2012 18:16 #38
Cotton candy - page 187-188 I believe. Somewhere thereabouts at least. I'm sure I can find a quote online.
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13-08-2012 18:16 #39
When is crying unemotional?
13-08-2012 18:18 #40
I refuse to read this book, purely based on the blurb at the back and from what I've read/heard about it!
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