How is everyone coping with being a new parent? Im a wreck. Bubs is only 6 days old and im completely paranoid about everything. Is he breathing? Is he going to vomit and choke? Am I being too rough? Am I cleaning him correctly at nappy change? It just goes on and on.
To top it off he has undescended testicles and now I'm freaked out that they aren't there at all (ultrasound scheduled for 3 weeks).
Also he was under so much stress at birth with terrible apgar of 4 at 1 minute (had rectified to 8 by 5 minutes). He spent a few nights in the neonatal unit but im so scared that he was oxygen starved and there may be long term effects. Obviously this won't be evident until development milestones. My midwife reassures me that all is fine and he's one healthy bubba.
Argh, I need to relax but this new parenting business is hard work! Sleep deprivation and a whole new way of life is hard to get used too but my heart melts everytime I look at him, hormones are out of control!!
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11-08-2012 22:54 #1
11-08-2012 22:57 #2
I'm sure you're doing just fine, but it's normal to second guess yourself.
Take care, and try to enjoy yourself - they really grow so fast!
11-08-2012 23:24 #3
I was (and guess i still am) exactly the same. DD is quite a spewy baby and i woke to every noise in those first two weeks as i was paranoid that she would choke. Now shes four weeks old and im relaxing into it.
I think its perfectly natural to feel this way but im sure youre doing fantastically! Just think of some of the mums out there...if they can do it so can you As long as your wee man is healthy, happy and growing then youre doing perfectly xxx
12-08-2012 00:14 #4-
- Join Date
- Feb 2010
- Home, where my life lies waiting, silently, for me.
Its pretty normal to be stressed at this stage.
Hope thing are a bit better soon!
12-08-2012 03:50 #5Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2008
I could have written your post 2 years ago.
DS had a very traumatic birth apgar 4 then 9.
On cpap for two days and in NICU for a week. Born full term 40+6.
A scan showed cysts on his brain and one dr (who didn't know asked if his birth was traumatic) I was a mess. What had there ppl allowed to happen to my son. I required a ga at birth so missed the whole thing and could not care for him after. I felt I had failed too. The nursing staff didn't even pick up his breathing difficulties. My mum did.
Your worry over you child will never go away. And you are entitled to.
I took antidepressant while pg and am still on them they do help but I still am heightened to be a worrier about my son. Trust your motherly instinct and who cares what others think.
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12-08-2012 04:21 #6
It's pretty normal to feel this way after what you and the baby have been through. Things will settle down and you will be able to relax a bit more. Make sure that despite all the worrying you still get to enjoy your newborn
12-08-2012 06:06 #7
Congratulations! The first days, especially for number one baby, are such a steep learning curve that your worries are quite normal (though hopefully they aren't stopping you from snatching some zzzz's when you have an opportunity!).
Just wanted to reassure you re the Apgar scores. Although a 4 indicates that bub was certainly fairly "stunned" at a minute, an 8 at five minutes is great and shows that probably fairly simple measures such as rubbing and drying him vigorously and providing support for breathing until he took over himself were successful. Babies are extraordinarily resilient little things and Apgars don't have any association with prognosis unless they are still poor at ten minutes or beyond. So your midwife is quite right! If you still have any concerns you could discuss them with your GP or paediatrician - they're used to answering all sorts of questions about newborns.
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13-08-2012 09:27 #8Junior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2012
- Eastern suburbs of melbourne
I know how you feel I was the same and still am the same with my dd, every time she would sleep longer than she normally would I would be on checking on her and the first time she started to sleep on her stomic at 9.5 mths I didn't sleep at all that night I kept getting up every half hour to check on her to make sure she was still breathing. And even now every time she changes her routine and sleeps more i worry she isn't ok and go to check on her. Mum keeps telling me that you are always like that with the first one then when the 2nd one comes along you are more relaxed and don't stress as much.
13-08-2012 10:28 #9Junior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2012
Just a quick lil reassurance to let you know that your worrying is completely normal. Our bub is 6wks now and I am still constantly reading things and googling lil things about beastfeeding, his health, his sleeping, routines, etc.
Th only advice I have is to try and relax a lil (easier said than done, I know). My midwife and docs have all said they are true believers that baby's feed off your energy. So the more anxious you are, then the more anxious you may find bub to be. Try and rest, and enjoy these special early weeks. They truly do go so fast. congratulations!! Good luck!
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