i saw the episode and switched off but saw the same parts.
controvertially if she thought he was totally rehabilitated and honestly thought him to be of no risk, the very least she should have done knowing his past, was educate her kids about adults not being allowed to touch private parts without permission, even if they were threatened they should have been told it is ok to tell someone they trust if anything like tht were to happen
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01-08-2012 19:17 #11
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01-08-2012 19:20 #12
Thankfully I didn't watch it! But I think she has total blame as their mother too! As a mum it is your job to protect your kids. If that means you're lonely and miserable but your kids aren't at risk then sorry but that's how it's gotta be! I can't feel sorry for the mother.
ETA: some things we cannot change that leave the kids at risk. But things we can we MUST!
Last edited by Pipsicle; 01-08-2012 at 19:23.
01-08-2012 19:23 #13
How sad Surely there would have been some sign. Sounds like she wanted to be married and was in denial?
01-08-2012 19:31 #14
I think the mother was incredibly stupid & naive.
This is one of my greatest worries now that I have my dd. I have been known to do things to keep from offending others, particularly family members, in the past but I can honestly say if I have even the slightest doubt about someone there is no chance they'll be anywhere near her, & I don't care who they are. And if they call me on it I'll tell them I'm not having creeps near my child.
The Dr. Phil ep sounds terribly sad.
01-08-2012 19:37 #15
Having been in this situation myself when I was a child. When I was 21 and I grew up and told my mum she said she knew it..... She bloody knew it she said. Then why wouldn't she do anything about it? For 5 years??
Anyway.... To me that woman on dr Phil is as bad as my mother! So many things would make me go on about this subject. But I didn't even see the episode!
If I were her daughters I would hold the mother at fault to a degree. Even if she didn't know it was happening at the time she knew he had done it before. In my opinion once a child molester always a child molester.
01-08-2012 19:45 #16
My mother ignored the signs in my case.
I was rapes by my stepfather from 10 - 13. He only stopped them because I fell pregnant.
Obviously DOCS got involved and eventually I told them what happened. My mother still wouldn't believe me. They broke up for different reasons two years later, after I had delivered my angel daughter at 24 weeks and moved out.
I still talk to my mum and love her, but our relationship is irreperably damaged.
A mother should be aware of signs of sexual abuse. It won't always be obvious, but she should have been more aware knowing his history.
Makes me feel sorry for the daughters
01-08-2012 19:46 #17
I watched it! Was really just sad and horrid to think an adult can do that. The worst part was how he was bringing other people into the house to do the same horrid stuff. The mum-oh dear! I would def not let anyone near my family like that but when you want to believe, I guess that's where you rationalize to make it okay. Wish I never watched it! Hugs to all who have experienced something similar xx
01-08-2012 19:53 #18
I didn't see it and glad I didn't.
01-08-2012 20:01 #19Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2012
I saw it. That man was evil and that poor poor girl was such a mess. I really felt for her. As someone who has not gone through sexual abuse but who has suffered from PTSD I hope she gets lots and lots of help when she gets back home. She will need it to live any kind of normal life. 8 years is such a looong time to suffer like that.
The mother, although at fault, obviously was wrecked over what had happened. Such a messy situation. As pp said, she should have in the very least taught her daughters about boundaries and privacy.
01-08-2012 20:04 #20Bubhub Ambassador - tongue in cheek
- Join Date
- Jul 2010
My heart goes out to the whole family.
Remember he is abuser. He groomed the mum too! He had to gain her full love & trust for her to marry him & get in the house.
I hope he rots in hell.
FYI afterwards I google child s 3 x o f e n d r s and found a really good Australia website giving names, photos and broad locations and crimes committed/jail sentences.
I've booked marked it.
WARNING ! graphic descriptions of s 3 x o f e n c s in many 'local' areas.
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