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  1. #31
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    Zombie_eyes is offline Formerly Diamondeyes
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    I actually didnt see the section it came from as im on my phone and it popped up in the new posts part so i apologise for intruding.

    I will say tho, i do personally find it difficult to relate to getting upset over what people who dont know me, and i dont know them say about something i do (especially when its not directed personally at me) Maybe i have developed a thick hide from having special needs children? But i learnt a long time ago to have a "and who the heck are you?" type of attitude when anyone says anything?

    What im trying to get at, and this is especially for you Benji because i see you get upset by the judgment of being a working mother all.the.time. Is... You are a wonderful mother, your child is happy and healthy and loved Dont ever feel down on yourself for providing for your child, Feel proud. There is NO WAY i could do what you do, regardless of the difference in the number of how many children we have. You know all that really matters at the end of the day is you, your child, and your partner... If all three of you are happy and content, then everyone else's opinion mean NOTHING.

    Im gonna bow out now. But really, every working parent should read my last paragraph, and even non working parents, change a few words and it applies to you too. Got Happy, loved children? you're winning!

  2. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Zombie_eyes For This Useful Post:

    BornToBe  (14-08-2012),Ra Ra Superstar  (14-08-2012),VicPark  (14-08-2012)

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    I only get upset here because this is one of the very few places for support for mothers (all mothers) and it's so anti-working mum. We can't even have a discussion in our own section without negativity. I don't have a problem with anything you've said DiamondEyes, just the constant and I mean constant negativity here about working mums and us not raising our own children and how evil child care is.

    The article was about *several* studies conducted and, of course, there must be a flaw with them

    I do agree that some children aren't well off in child care, mine was one of them. I had to wait until he was 3. But that doesn't make the studies flawed

    Anyway, I really think I've had enough of this place. If mothers can't even discuss the fact that child care isn't harmful for most children then I'm out. This place isn't supportive, it's a hole.

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  5. #33
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    Zombie_eyes is offline Formerly Diamondeyes
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    Ill delete all my contributions, people who quoted me, can u edit me out please?

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    Default Kids couldn't care less about going to child-care

    Quote Originally Posted by DiamondEyes View Post
    I actually didnt see the section it came from as im on my phone and it popped up in the new posts part so i apologise for intruding.

    I will say tho, i do personally find it difficult to relate to getting upset over what people who dont know me, and i dont know them say about something i do (especially when its not directed personally at me) Maybe i have developed a thick hide from having special needs children? But i learnt a long time ago to have a "and who the heck are you?" type of attitude when anyone says anything?

    What im trying to get at, and this is especially for you Benji because i see you get upset by the judgment of being a working mother all.the.time. Is... You are a wonderful mother, your child is happy and healthy and loved Dont ever feel down on yourself for providing for your child, Feel proud. There is NO WAY i could do what you do, regardless of the difference in the number of how many children we have. You know all that really matters at the end of the day is you, your child, and your partner... If all three of you are happy and content, then everyone else's opinion mean NOTHING.

    Im gonna bow out now. But really, every working parent should read my last paragraph, and even non working parents, change a few words and it applies to you too. Got Happy, loved children? you're winning!
    This has happened to me too (not seeing the section when on the phone).

    And no worries I wasn't offended by the suggestion that it's not good for some kids, you weren't rude.

    I like well rounded discussions with bits and pieces from both sides, thats how you learn. But I also see that some need a refuge to discuss things with people in similar situations.

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    Quote Originally Posted by bumMum View Post
    If this were an article about it being harmful for kids to go to daycare in the first year of life, everyone on this forum would have loved it just about. Or an article about how children who stay at home full time are happier..
    All this crap about about how childcare is bad for kids under 2 is just that. Crap. People pushing their own values for their family on other mothers, in an attempt to feel superior about their choices.

    Sent from my HTC Desire S using BubHub
    I was the first one to post that my child did care, and still cares 4 years later. She attended the very best centre in town, the staff bent over backwards to support her, so the damage would have been far worse in a poor quality centre, but it was still damaging to her.

    As with Benji, I would have been stressed and we would have both gone hungry had it not been for me working, but to say "kids don't care" as a blanket statement is just as bad as saying it is harmful as a blanket statement.

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    I think genetics and personality have much more to do with how smart, stressed, anxious, socially confident etc children are/become than childcare. It's such an individual thing. I think the whole childcare debate is kinda null and void really.

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    Note to self - never spend a dime on a Nem Fox book!

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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackEyedPea View Post
    Note to self - never spend a dime on a Nem Fox book!
    Her books are fun, he attitude towards some things sucks. She may feel different though, most people said dumb things as new, first time mums, just lucky most of us didn't do so publicly.

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    Quote Originally Posted by share a book View Post
    Her books are fun, he attitude towards some things sucks. She may feel different though, most people said dumb things as new, first time mums, just lucky most of us didn't do so publicly.
    Sure I agree, but public people need to take responsibility for the statements they make and her statement would undoubtedly have been very damaging to many parents. Shame on her for that.

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    Apologies working parents, I didn't see what section this was in, either. Downfall of "New Posts" button. I didn't mean to offend, just wanted to read more about the research.

    Don't forget you may be damned if you do, and SAHM's are damned if we don't. Can't win when you're a mother.


 
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