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22-07-2012 12:57 #11
Last edited by MissPoss; 08-08-2012 at 09:09.
22-07-2012 13:03 #12
Its awful feeling like that it really is. Its not your fault; its a self protection mechanism. He needs to be as open as possible and accept that you will find it hard to trust him for a while. He's broken trust. And there are consequences.
Aw, I just want to give you a big hug. Be kind to yourself.
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22-07-2012 13:06 #13Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2011
I don't know if I'd be able to get over the hurt TBH. He hasn't physically cheated but he was being selfish, disrespectful to you and obviously didn't care about your feelings. For me, I think I would forever wonder if he'd have gone ahead and met her if I didn't find out and THAT would be the undoing for me.
That being said I hope you can resolve it if that's what you want - the above would be if I was in your situation xx
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22-07-2012 13:12 #14Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2011
I would definitely class this as cheating. My DH did the same thing, and we ended up separated (this was only part of the reason). I had the best time while separated, and he realised the grass is not greener.
We got back together, separated again, then went to lots of counselling. Things are great now. I know he doesn't talk to that person, and yes, I still get jealous sometimes. I think deep down though, I trust he'll never do anything he knows he shouldn't as he knows what he could lose.
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22-07-2012 13:15 #15
I'm glad he wants the relationship to work but he needs to change and not just expect you to comply to his every whim and need so that he isn't tempted to wander off again.
22-07-2012 13:17 #16
22-07-2012 13:53 #17
I would be asking him to put his relationship with you before her, and so if remorseful to completely cut ties with the woman, delete email account and open another. Some kind of gesture to show you mean more to him than a foolish flirtation.
men are so silly!
22-07-2012 14:01 #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2006
22-07-2012 14:06 #19
Yes it cheating.
As for feeling like you need to check up on him all the time, that's normal and smart. He threw away his right to privacy when he did that. He needs to Earn you trust back. It will take as long as it takes. He needs to know this and he needs to agree with too it.
You do not need to make him feel like a man, he needs to man up and act like one. This is in no way about you neglecting him, because you didn't he neglected you and your child by not being there supporting you and your child through that hard time.
22-07-2012 14:35 #20
Yes I would consider it cheating and no I couldn't trust him again.
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